Oregonian taking a lot of heat from readers for this one. What do you think?

Or maybe it was the steamy, 100-degree heat that no one on the team was accustomed to.

 

Keep making excuses for him. Nothing but a bunch of softass politically correct panzies around here.

 

This is good. I’m not sure the right term for faux hot-takery, but it’s good.

 

Doc, I often wonder when stances like this are taken, is there any thought given to what if he didn't do it?

Is he collateral damage if he didn't do it?

Is he just a cautionary tale if he didn't do it?

If that makes me a politically correct pansy, well ...

 

Fade in:
EXT. DOWNTOWN COURTHOUSE - DAY
Cut to:
INT. COURTROOM - DAY
A prosecutor is addressing the jury passionately, giving his closing arguments as the accused and his lawyer sit in the background visibly anxious.

PROSECUTOR​

The defense will ask you to consider that there are no witnesses. They will want you to focus on how he has always maintained his innocence. They will harp on the lack of any evidence.

But I'll leave you with just one question. Would an innocent man turn the ball over seven times and go 0-for-5 from behind the three-point line in the Sub-state semifinals?

 

A like really wasn't strong enough for that, Jake.

 

At least we can now be certain that Ray Lewis was completely innocent.

 

I always respect your thoughts, shot. It's a fair consideration you give. Carry on ...

 

Finally, a valid explanation for David Price's postseason suckitude.

Now how to explain his previous NCAA tournament wins over LSU and Minnesota on national TV?

 

It's the Ray Finkle Theory police have been quietly working for years: Playoff chokes and criminal behavior are related.

 

If you don't think Heimlich felt the pressure of the moment, you're an idiot. Glad he failed.

 

Wait. I thought he wasn't a criminal according to you softass clowns. He just made a mistake as a young teenager that didn't know any better than to molest a 6 year-old girl. It was all innocent and he deserves to be glorified, isn't that right?