OK, who is going to volunteer to model the sj.com thong?

I won't post pictures, but I'm wearing one right now... And I swear, Webby didn't put me up to this... I highly recommend everyone buy one. It drives the chicks wild!

 

You're not alone. Dooley has been begging me to do it, via PM.

 

Good memory, man! I don't think she knows I exist, so I am pretty sure she isn't pondering my thong. I'm thinking the gay guy downstairs who always tries to kiss me is more into the thong than she is.

Which reminds me of a story... Think I've told this one on here. More than 10 years ago, in my first place after moving back to NY, I lived in this old tenament building in Greenwich Village. Coolest street and neighborhood on earth, but the place was an overpriced dump. I wasn't earning much yet. I shared this mouse-infested dump with two friends. My next door neighbor was this old, sharp-tongued Cuban guy who had lived there for about 40 years--rent controlled. Was probably paying $45 a month for it. He wasn't wealthy. He was a waiter. He was funny as hell. Would go off on these rants about everything and anything and leave people in stitches. For example, he once saw his dentist when a bunch of us were sitting outside drinking some beer, and he yelled, "Hey doc, how's the Cadillac?" The dentist says, "What Cadillac?" ... "The one I've been paying for."

Anyhow, he was a gay guy, but not flaming gay. I didn't think of him as a gay guy as much as I thought of him as a funny-as-shit, cantankerous old Cuban guy. He had fled Castro because gays were persecuted, so all you had to do was mention Castro to get him rolling on a rant. Most of the 20-somethings ignored the old-time residents in the village. It's sort of a weird phenomenon. I embraced them.Got to know everyone on my block and there were so many interesting people with great stories, including this neighbor. He was a good guy underneath the acid tongue.

One year, for Christmas he brought me a gift, which surprised me. I was flattered until I opened it in front of him. In the box there were three pairs of bikini underwear, one with a tiger skin print on it. It was one of the most awkward moments I have ever experienced. I didn't know if he was making a statement with them or if he was clueless as to how inappropriate it was. If you knew him, you'd understand why I wasn't sure. I barely got off a flustered "thank you."