Oh boy. On which board should I post this story?

http://www.todaysthv.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=66449&catid=2

This may be the perfect SportsJournalists.com thread, because it has all the elements.

It's Sports and News because four people were shot at a wedding.

It's Anything Goes because of the bizarreness of it: The shooter got mad because his dog got in a fight with the bride's dog. At a wedding! Besides the fact the arresting officer shares the last name of the suspect.

And it's Journalism Topics because of the God-awfulness of the most complete story to date written about it. If I were a J-101 prof, your homework assignment would be to rewrite this shit.

The only things missing from the entire scene are the rain and the train. Check that: The bride's train was flowing. So a raindrop shy of a David Allan Coe song.

 

Damn, I want to see that wedding video.

 

It's on a TV station's web site, meaning it was probably written by some hack foof and never edited before it was put online.

That being said, a true writer could have had some real fun writing about that whole deal.

 

Knowing that area like I do, I doubt the bride was wearing white.

 

That seems like a normal, perhaps even understated, reaction.

 

And there was at least one banjo involved.

 

What's the over-under on the total number of teeth in attendance at that wedding?

 

Only in Arkansas.

or West Virginia.

or certain parts of Oklahoma.

 

Would you call this a shotgun wedding? <rimshot>

 

We need a "Shallow End of the Gene Pool Running Thread"

 

The comments are the best part.

The sister of the bride has weighed in with corrections. The TV reporter then responds with an explanation of how the story was generated. Then a friend of the shooter posts there's a media cover-up going on.

 

Has one of our own become the latest to weigh in on this important story? You be the judge: