New feature story (Non-sports related)

Here is my latest story, a non-sports article. This is about a woman's dog who has been a lifesaver to her. This is part of a series that the newspaper does called "The Dart" where we throw darts at a map of Vidalia and Natchez, the two towns that are beside our coverage area, and find a human-interest story. Sometimes it relates to sports but sometimes it does not.
Link: The Dart: Dog becomes woman’s lifesaver - Mississippi's Best Community Newspaper

 

I can see a place for this in local journalism. But your lead is not a lead. That's like the second or third graph. I think this is a great place to put some description or emotion into the story.

If you literally drove up and saw her walking the dog, tell us what the dog was doing

 

I didn't learn anything about the lady, or anything about the dog. There was no reporting. Story was: random lady walks dog every day. Did you consider doing research on a rat terrier dogs? Or describing what one looks like? I don't even know what's on Alabama Street. Why is that location remarkable? Why did you pick this lady in the first place? If you're going to take the time to write a story, leave an impression. Get a ton of details. Then, make good decisions about which details you decide to include. A dog that likes to play Frisbee is not remarkable.

More advice: Read some GOOD newspapers. Every. Single. Day. Read and study anthologies of the year's best sports writing and/or feature writing. Go to the Sports Illustrated archives and check out their stories on dogs/dog shows, etc. Take journalism classes. Dissect 4 stories a week that you think are powerful and figure out why they're powerful. Keep a journal. Practice writing every. single. day.

Based on this and past posts, there's ample evidence that you're not clear about what the fundamentals of reporting are and how to execute them. Develop some tools.

I know this is blunt - but it's not personal. If you care about this profession, you'll care about excellence. Go to it!

 

Thanks for the advice. The DART is actually a random story and you never know what you get with this story because it's so sporadic. Sometimes you get a good story and sometimes you do not get a good story. The Editor said it was fine the way it is.

 

This is great advice. The word "great" is greatly overused, IMHO. But not with ringer's post.

 

Lesson 1: As a journalist, your job is to (a) FIND the story and (b) MAKE it compelling. There's no excuse. Everybody has a story. Hard truth: you simply didn't invest enough time or effort in your reporting. Also, rather than accept a "random" story - have you considered doing research and pitching a DART story that holds your interest? Be proactive. You'll care more ... and when you care, it'll be apparent in the writing.

Lesson 2: "Editor said it was 'fine.'" So? Why lower your standards to what your editor thinks? Wouldn't you much rather have your editor (and/or readers) say it was "excellent" or "unique" or "revealing?"

No need to answer. Just remember these points.

 

My editor actually gives little positive feedback and you can't pitch a DART story. It's just a random story that just happens sporadically.

 

1) Years ago, I was required to participate in something similar to what you refer to as DART stories. Every editorial staffer did. I was sports editor and it sucked. Uh, I have a section to produce every day?
Anyway,
2) Your editor seems lame.

 

Then find a dart that finds good stories. Honestly "getting a good story or not a good story"...I mean if there is no story, don't do one. There are a lot of stories that you can make interesting just by observing and getting tons of detail. Make sure to pay attention to the little things. There are a lot of nuggets and descriptions when you sprinkle them into your stories they add up.

I would echo what ringer said. Look up journalists you look up to and read their work or read past stories from good papers from their archives.