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Need opinions of parents.....

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by zagoshe, Nov 13, 2009.

  1. SixToe

    SixToe Well-Known Member

    I'd ground him for lying and he would not play in the tournament.

    Your responsibility is to him as a parent. Everything else is secondary.

    As for the homework, not doing it for a day or three is one thing. Not doing it for two weeks (and lying about it) shows something is amiss. Figure that out and deal with it, too.

    Good luck.
     
  2. shockey

    shockey Active Member

    he played you about having his homeworks done and got burned. case closed. eff the team. eff the parents.

    it's life lesson time for this young man. good job by you, from this father of three boys ages 14-19. middle teen plays h.s. football and lacrosse and knows the deal: grades slip, he's done.

    easy for him, he's also the best student of the three. if he wasn't so damn cool, his brothers would hate him.
     
  3. ADodgen

    ADodgen Member


    Just wanted to echo this. Also not a parent, but was a kid who had the same kind of problems. For whatever reason, I just chose not to do my homework. Lied about it, made up reasons I couldn't do things (because I was ineligible).

    As sympathetic as I am to your son, I am 100% in favor of the grounding.
     
  4. zagoshe

    zagoshe Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the input - and to put this to a close --- I made it very simple:

    He is staying home this weekend and every weekday between now and the end of the report period - almost four weeks - he has study hall here at home.

    He's not happy but too bad.

    I called coach to tell him and got one last attempt at the "team suffers" guilt trip and I basically told him "Coach, he's an 8th grader and he needs to understand the importance of not being a sneak as well as doing his job. And right now, his job is to get good grades and he is capable of that."

    One other parent called me and I told him the same thing and he went into this crap about how much the tournament cost and I basically said I couldn't help him.

    Once I dealth with that, then I got on a roll because my daughter came to me and said she needed a ride to her friend's house - so I was like OK, and just as we're leaving my wife says "hold up - did you clean your room like I told you?" and my daughter said but, but, but, but -- and without hesitation I said to my wife "Did you tell her to clean her room before she went anywhere?" and my wife said "yes" so I looked at my daughter and said "well, then, you tried to go behind your mom's back and do something you weren't supposed to be doing. I don't appreciate it - so not only will you not go to your friends house tonight, you will be in your room tonight and you will clean it. And tomorrow, you will sit in your clean room until I tell you to come out...."

    Well of course she's not happy with me now, either, but kids learn to manipulate and lie and if you don't get it early you end up raising assholes.
     
  5. outofplace

    outofplace Well-Known Member

    Nicely done.
     
  6. Rosie

    Rosie Active Member

    Nobody said parenthood was easy.
     
  7. Flying Headbutt

    Flying Headbutt Moderator Staff Member

    Would you believe someone was there taking pictures of Zag as he was getting ready to take his daughter out?

    [​IMG]
     
  8. The Big Ragu

    The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

    And I'll let ya out when you've learned your lessons!

    [​IMG]
     
  9. YankeeFan

    YankeeFan Well-Known Member

    Funny picture. The one kid is already broken & crying, but the other looks pretty damn defiant.
     
  10. bagelchick

    bagelchick Active Member

    Good for you. And good for you for following through.

    One of the things my dad always told me is that you don't have to be best friends with your kids. In fact, it's fine if they don't like you.

    My upbringing was tough, but now that I'm older, I can totally appreciate what was instilled at me during those formulative years......respect, responsibility, work ethic. All those things that many kids these days seem to be lacking.
     
  11. expendable

    expendable Well-Known Member

    Good job, Zag. He'll be better off for it, and won't let down the team again.
     
  12. Lugnuts

    Lugnuts Well-Known Member

    Zag, I'm only a parent to a toddler, but you've got my vote.

    As for the other kids, a valuable lesson for them to learn is that sometimes people let you down.

    Sports is just one of the areas where it happens at every level- high school, college, pro. Star player flunks out. Star player gets caught with pot. Star player gets arrested.

    Hey - the other kids need to know - if it can happen to the New York Giants, it can happen to their cup team. At least your son didn't walk into a night club and shoot himself in the leg, then try to cover it up! ... Or mastermind a dogfighting ring. ;D

    Please report back, and let us know how he's doing. Future parents of preteens and teens want to know.
     
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