Name my sports column

PEANUT BUTTER PENIS

 

HAPPINESS IS A TIGHT PUSSYCAT ;D

 

"Flabby, flaccid, saggy, soggy, splitting tubes of rotting animal flesh, floating languidly in a malodorous bucket of fetid swill."

 

"Crap I Wrote"

 

No-name Column

Column Inches

Doric, Ionic or Classical

Fishwrap

Flyswatter

For the Birdcage


It will take me longer to come up with some for real suggestions. You could have a Name my Column contest. One, it would spark some reader interest, and two, it's two or three columns of material.

 

Might be able to use it in SC's "red state", but it's taken in upstate NY (and probably a bunch of other places, too).

 

ONE BITTER YOUNG HACK

 

Since you're in South Carolina, how about The SCene.


Too SChitty???

 

Reading between the lines

 

The actual name of a sports column Way Back When: Here's the Dope (Galveston Daily News, 1930s)

The actual name of another sports column in the old days: Homade Hooch (Davenport Democrat and Leader, 1920s).

I think either of those deserves to be exhumed.

 

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I've seen both of these over the years.

Outside the Huddle

From the Pressbox

Yes, both suck, but you have to name it something.