Movies you watched and loved as a child only to re-watch and hate as an adult

I love watching Disney classics with my kids. The Pixar movies and Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Lion King and Little Mermaid are in pretty heavy rotation at my house and for the most part, they're all unbelievable films.

Lately, I've been trying to show them some of the classics. They loved Jungle Book, the animated 101 Dalmatians, Snow White, Peter Pan and Bambi.

Yesterday, we watched Pinocchio.

Other than 10 minutes at the beginning, holy shit does this movie suck. Nothing like I remembered it as a kid. My 3-year-old gave me a look as if to say, "What the fuck is this shit? Daddy, put The Incredibles back on."

I've noticed this with a couple other Disney classics. Dumbo does not hold up very well, but it's not terrible.

 

Does liking the Ewoks as a child, but hating them now count?

 

I thought Pinocchio looked really good on the screen. I even saw a restored version in the theater 15 or so years ago.

I kind of like that story for some reason. I'm a sucker for Jiminy Cricket, I guess.

 

I always hated the Ewoks. Fracking muppets. No way in hell could a tribe of primitive muppets take out "a legion of my best troops." My thought when I was kid was "If those were your best troops...."

E.T. doesn't work for me anymore. Neither does Gremlins. How can a bunch of little punk-rock green creatures cause
THAT much trouble? A few competent folks exercising their second amendment rights could've taken care of those things in a nice neat 30 minute episode. Watched it on TV and could only think "Phoebe Cates in a bikini would TOTALLY salvage this film."

 

In a bikini while it's snowing? Which is more believable then? Gremlins or her in a two-piece romping in the snow?

 

Howard The Duck is complete trash. I felt robbed 20 years later.

 

The old cartoon version of "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe." I remember loving that as a kid, and before the live-action movie came out a few years ago I rented it. Sucktastic.

 

Stuff like this is part of why I don't plan on having kids. One, I'll have no reason to rent kids' movies. Two, I can remember how enthralled I was by those movies without disappointing myself now.

 

Dumbo. I watched that movie countless time when I was a child, but I watched it again with my baby cousin was over visiting with her aunt for the afternoon. I'm sitting here thinking, "What is this garbage?"

 

Home Alone.

The movie was essentially a Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner cartoon without Acme Corporation products and painted-on tunnels. You'd think the bad guys would have been knocked unconscious somewhere along the way.

 

Very, very true. A paint can upside the head would knock any man unconscious regardless of who it is. These guys were getting right back up as if they were just bitch-slapped rather than having been nailed with a paint can.

 

Oh, man. I forgot about that one. I hope it airs on HBO sometime. When An American Tail did, I almost wet myself.