More hilarity from The Onion

Dr. Seuss is not happy.

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/stop_making_movies_about_my

 

Also, Seuss.

 

I hate you

 

That was freaking awesome.

 

Don't lash out at me because Mikey rejected you.

 

I am bad at everything.

 

It even has a semblance of meter!

 

This is effin' hilarious. Rarely does the Onion disappoint.

The next time any of you are in a bookstore, find the Onion's anthology of newspaper stories of the 20th century, "Our Dumb Century". Grab it and run to the counter. It's one of the funniest things you'll ever read and you'll thank me later.

 

Yes, it's worth the price, even if it only had the moon landing story.

 

Funny you mentioned that, FOTF.

One night about 10 years ago, my wife calls me at work. She's laughing so hard, she can't even tell me why she called. Then, she reads -- or should I say "tries to read" -- the moon landing story.

She gets about six words out before breaking out in hysterical laughter so intense she was gasping for air. She couldn't even finish reading it before she had to go catch her breath.

In 17 1/2 years of marriage and three years of dating, I've never seen her laugh this hard at anything. And we've seen many A-list comedians live.

 

A buddy of mine has "The Tenth Circle," a best-of Onion book.
I loved the "Very Special Forces" article with a pic of a man with Downs syndrome in fatigues, the column headlined, "Women: Why don't they lose some weight?" and an article headlined, "So these dudes come flying out of nowhere and start whaling on this guy."

 

I post this every time, but nothing will ever make me laugh harder. Ever.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/27899