More baseball predictions

I don't know about all you other Braves fans out there, but the number of national analysts picking them as a "surprise team" this year is starting to get me worried.

 

Anyone who thinks Torre can appreciably improve a mediocre ball club has a big surprise coming.

 

Neifi Perez will be a Red by Memorial Day.

 

I just can't wait to watch him abuse someone else's bullpen like he did the Yankees.
Is Scott Proctor still with the Dodgers? Did he have a heart attack when it was announced Torre was going to be his manager?

 

fuckabuncha dodgers, 'gola. i'm having a hard time getting ready for baseball.

 

The Pirates will still suck.

 

Surprise team: Reds, despite Dusty.

Disappointing team: Mariners

Cardinals team ERA: Under 9.00. Barely.

Number of starts by Smoltz, Glavine and Hampton combined: 40-50

Combined IQ in the ESPN booth last night if Jon Miller had stepped out to take a leak and left Joe and W in there: less than 100.

 

Mike Mussina

Number of starts until he allows more than 6 runs: 2
Number of starts before he fails to get out of the second inning: 4
Number of starts until he is no longer in the Yankees rotation: 10

I hope I'm wrong, but I'm guessing the only surprise in store for Mussina this season is his days in pinstripes are numbered.

 

The New York Post's Joel Sherman wrote an early column that he later blogged about Mussina signing with the Mets following this season. The rational makes sense. Mussina is beholden to his routines and if he can't follow them in the Bronx, Flushing is as good a fallback as any.

http://blogs.nypost.com/sports/st/archives/2008/04/3_down_joba_wan.html#more

 

Biggest shock: the Royals started the season w/ a payroll above 30 mil.

 

The Mets won't get 15 starts out of Pedro Martinez.

Gagne will be Milwaukee's closer for about a month.

Jack Cust will be an All-Star.

The Giants will contend.

 

Tom Gordon will cause me to say "fuck" a lot on many summer evenings.