Monorail ... D'Oh

Leonard Nimoy: "My job here is done."
Barney: "What do you mean, you didn't do anything."
Nimoy: "Didn't I?"

 

Leonard Nimoy: [appraising the monorail] I'd say this vessel could do at least warp 5.
Mayor Quimby: Yes, and may I say, "May the Force be with you."
Leonard Nimoy: [annoyed] Do you even know who I am?
Mayor Quimby: I think I do. Aren't you one of the Little Rascals?

 

To be a complete pedant, the line at the end of the song is 'Mono ... D'oh!'

Oh, Andy Capp, you wife-beating drunk.

 

Yea and was typed out in the thread title so it wasn't quite as an ambiguous.

 

Marge (when the monorail is out of control): Homer, I have someone here who can help you.
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: No, it's a scientist.
Homer: Batman was a scientist.
Marge: IT'S NOT BATMAN!

 

Marge: We're too late!

Scientist: Oh, I shouldn't have stopped for that haircut ...

 

Mayor Quimby: "I've called this meeting to discuss what we will do with the $2 million dollars."

Lisa: "Don't you mean $3 million dollars?"

Mayor Quimby: "Uhhh, yes, I meant $3 million dollars."

 

Disguised Burns: My name is Mr. Snrub. I think we should invest it all into the nuclear power plant.

Smithers: I like the way, Snrub thinks.

 

I reckon that's acceptable.

There ain't no monorail and there never was!

'... and the celebrity on the maiden voyage was Gallagher.'

 

Marge: "My name is Marge Simpson and I have an idea. It may sound a little boring at first."
Mayor Quimby: "Chat away. I'll just amuse myself with some pornographic playing cards."

 

Greatest non-sequitor in Simpsons history ... by miles.

 

I can't remember what Nimoy says as the train is careening out of control, but the reaction of the guy next to him always cracks me up. "Does anyone want to switch seats?"