M'fkers who sing while they're calling in games.

Yeah, why the hell do they wait until the LAST fucking story to call in and complain?

Call in the first time it's misspelled and it won't be misspelled again.

Duh.

 

Yeah. I had one of these two. The coach was convinced he was right until, of course, he asked the kid how to spell his name and he told him the way I spelled it. It's fun telling the coach how to spell his kid's names.

took a call from the mother of another kid on the team b/c I spelled her son's name wrong. Roster said "Jared" and his name is "Jarred" and she said he was upset b/c his name is always spelled wrong.

I wanted to tell her that if his parents could spell his name properly at birth, they wouldn't have this problem.

 

Yeah, why is it we can spell "Shaniqua" and "Mackenzie" correctly, but mess up on all of the "Jarrod," "Jared" and "Jerod"s?

 

It's the friggin' CABBAGE PATCH ERA of parents.

Normal names no longer have normal spellings.

How many ways can we spell Ashley? I mean Ashlee? I mean Ashleigh? LET ME COUNT THE WAYS . . .

 

We had a very good baseball player at our main high school (a kid who now plays Division I ball) start for four years.
His first name was misspelled on every roster and, thus, in all of my stories, until halfway through his senior year.
His mom was very nice about it when she casually mentioned to me I had had it wrong for more than three years.

 

Once had three of these on the SAME TEAM.

Ashley, Ashlee and Ashleigh.

Couldn't wait for graduation.

 

How about Kaitlin, Caitlin, Katelyn, Katelynn, Catelyn, etc...

 

so we've finally come to the conclusion that parents are idiots?

 

How about emails like this one I got last week (names changed to protect the innocent):

IN CROSS COUNTRY ACTION THIS WEEK THE BOTH EAGLES TEAMS WON THE MEET THAT WAS HOSTED BY MOUNT NOWHERE SCHOOL. THE MEET WAS ATTENDED BY EAST PODUNK, PODUNK CENTRAL, WEST PODUNK, NORTH PODUNK, NORTH NOWHERESVILLE. SEVERAL TEAMS DID NOT FIELD COMPLETE TEAMS IN THIS EVENT BUT HAD RUNNERS IN EACH OF THE RACES.
THE BOYS RACE WAS WON BY IMARUNNER FASTBOY, A STAND-OUT RUNNER FROM NORTH PODUNK, FOLLOWED BY CHASE MEUPPAHILL OF PODUNK CENTRAL. ERIC LITTLELONGLEGS WAS 3RD FOR EAST PODUNK... I KNEW THE MEET BETWEEN EAST AND CENTRAL WAS CLOSE BUT DID NOT REALIZE UNTIL THAT WE HAD BEATEN THEM FOR AWHILE AFTER THE MEET. THEIR GIRLS TEAM IS LIKE OURS IN DEALING WITH SOME INJURIES AND RUNNING WITH SOME GIRLS NOT AT FULL STRENGTH AS THIS TIME.
OUR TEAMS ARE BACK IN ACTION NEXT WED. AT PODUNK PARK AT 5:00 WHEN THEY WILL BE RACING AT THE CONF. CHAMPIONSHIP MEET. IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THIS ONE MEET FOR THE CONF. CHAMPIONSHIP AND WE HOPE WE CONTINUE TO RUN WELL ON THAT DAY. WE MUST KEEP WORKING HARD AND HOPE TO HAVE EVERYONE IN SOMEWHAT GOOD HEALTH. IT MAKES FOR SOME NERVOUS DAYS WHEN IT ALL COMES DOWN TO ONE RACE FOR CONF. CHAMPS AND THEN YOU HAVE TO GET READY FOR REGIONALS THE NEXT WEEK. THANKS-----COACH ALLCAPS

 

Ayshlie, Aeschlea, Aschli

 

Britney/Brittney/Brittni/Brittney/Britnei is/are just as bad...

 

Once upon a time I worked with a guy who answered the phone and was forced to take a time-consuming track meet (this was in the days before e-mail and fax machines) and instead of covering the phone with his hand and mumbling a few choice words - most of which were probably used in some of the faux school names listed throughout this thread), he put the phone to his chest and said them.

Caller heard every muffled word he said and called back to complain.

Proves that sometimes the dummies are answering the phone as well as calling the games in, I guess.