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Man arrested based on choice of sex partner

Discussion in 'Sports and News' started by poindexter, Mar 28, 2008.

  1. poindexter

    poindexter Well-Known Member


    Man Caught Having Sex with a Picnic Table

    Arthur Price

    BELLEVUE, OH -- A man in central Ohio is accused of having sex with his picnic table.

    The investigation began when a tipster gave police three DVDs showing Arthur Price having sexual intercourse with a metal round table on his deck.

    The incidents occurred between January and March 2008.

    Police say the DVDs show Price involved in a sex act in his bedroom. He walks out to his deck, tilts the table on its side and has sex with it.

    Police say Price lives near an elementary school.

    Price admitted that he had sex with the picnic table when police questioned him.

    He confirmed to police the incidents caught on the DVDs and said he had also had sex with the table inside the home.

    Price faces four counts of public indecency. He is free on a $20,000 bond.
  2. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Teacher-picnic table sex again??
  3. Rumpleforeskin

    Rumpleforeskin Active Member


    Uh, hey Boo Boo, what do you say we go steal some pic-i-nic baskets? Oh my God! Not that one!
  4. Captain_Kirk

    Captain_Kirk Well-Known Member

    How old was the picnic table?
  5. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Could have been worse. Could have been a wooden picnic table.
  6. Oggiedoggie

    Oggiedoggie Well-Known Member

    "Pardon me, Is this table taken?"
  7. novelist_wannabe

    novelist_wannabe Well-Known Member

    The table thought he was Matt Damon
  8. patchs

    patchs Active Member

    I hear the table had a great set of legs.
  9. Norman Stansfield

    Norman Stansfield Active Member

    I'm just trying to picture this.

    I can't. How is this possible?
  10. poindexter

    poindexter Well-Known Member

    You know that hole in the middle where you place the umbrella?
    Vombatus likes this.
  11. Norman Stansfield

    Norman Stansfield Active Member

    Yeah, see, that's what I didn't understand.

    I always thought the difference was a patio table had the umbrella hole and a picnic table didn't.

    Maybe it's just semantics. Maybe the reporter could have done a better job of explaining it.

    Then again, maybe that's enough information already.
  12. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Dammit, Dexter, how about a NSFW warning before you go on graphically describing the private parts of a picnic table?
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