"Mallrats" is horrible

I have it dialed up on OnDemand right now, and I never realized how awful it is.

The dialogue is laughable -- no actual people in the world would ever, ever talk like that. The acting is almost universally absurd. The story is preposterous. How did this movie not kill Kevin Smith's career?

 

Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn for Sega.

 

Awesome.

It's a crappy movie, but there are some pretty good one-liners in there.

 

Because MOST Kevin Smith fans are delusional about how much talent he actually has. I liked Clerks and Chasing Amy, but most of his stuff is pretty average.

 

I remember being wildly disappointed by Mallrats...until the very end, when Ben Affleck is fucking his tweener girlfriend and asking her to call him various members of the New Kids on the Block.

Totally worth the price of admission.

Other than that, though, I agree...by far the worst of his flicks. (His being Smith, not Affleck...the latter has made tons of shit worse than Mallrats)

 

You and mikey can get together and masturbate to that scene.

 

I'd rather just beat your ass, honestly.

 

Claire Forlani is really hot in that movie, though.

 

I meant to say, the most redeeming quality is the presence of Claire Forlani, who in her prime was the most beautiful woman in the history of the universe.

 

So many options for the quote function there, I think I'll just let it sit and leave it to the imagination.

 

, but your taste in movies is worse.

 

I couldn't make it through watching more than five minutes of this movie.