Madonna at the Super Bowl?

Read somewhere today it was supposedly announced Sunday the Material Girl herself is, in fact, slated for the halftime gong show in Indy.

Luck us.

 

Bon Jovi's ego won't allow him to take the stage with someone as big or bigger than him.

 

I saw Elvis Costello on a solo acoustic tour in Los Angeles in '84. He brought John Hiatt out on stage. I had never heard him before. They did a duet of his song "She Loves the Jerk." I went out the next morning to buy the album.

He's really, really good.

 

Even Flow would take up the whole set.

 

I guess Madonna's "announcement" was made last night during the NBC game, causing Madonna's pick to be discussed at length in the newsroom.

The consensus here: Why go for the 1980s Madonna when you can get the 2011 version, Katy Perry?

 

I'd like to thank Janet Jackson, Kid Suck, and Sex Offender Beard Timberlake for "Titgate 2004." Thanks to these asshats we won't get another relevant act at the Super Bowl until the last Boomer alive drops the fuck dead. And even then, they'll probably have "A Musical Tribute to the Baby Boomers," with marching band forming The Led Zeppelin logos, followed by a tube snorting up lines of cocaine, followed by a pair of fat-ass Docker pants, followed by an SUV, followed by spelling out "401k" only to have the formation break into a thousand pieces and fall apart at the end.

 

*bowing in your general direction*

 

Hell, they should have went all out for Gaga. Just about every high school marching band in middle America has one of her songs in their repertoire, anyway.

 

My friend: "Did you hear Madonna is playing the Super Bowl halftime?"
Me: "Yeah, I'm kind of glad. It allows for me to have ample time to take a dump after all the pizza and wings."

 

Sadly, Jacko might've been in line for the Super Bowl after the New York one.

 

Look, if the Super Bowl halftime show wasn't lame, it wouldn't be the NFL as we've always known it. As this selection shows, they've run plumb out of superannuated rock acts composed of men who won't expose their breasts. Now we're hitting the '80s acts. Look for a Hanson revival sometime in the next 10 years.

 

Just because I read the sentence "as this selection shows" incorrectly, I had the thought, how long will it be until the NFL is giving us a half-hour, halftime selection show? It will feature music by potential acts with being played over interviews with each artist about some mundane connection they have to sports.