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Looking for some advice and suggestions

Discussion in 'Writers' Workshop' started by jray, Jun 30, 2010.

  1. jray

    jray New Member

    advice and suggestions
  2. Stitch

    Stitch Active Member

    You should probably ask your editor for help. You're missing a comma in the lede. You mention Fox is a first-year head coach in the fourth graf, but already wrote that in the second graf.

    "Unlike most schools the team is ..." (Missing a comma).

    Learn how to split a quote.

    You have to many redundancies and you need a lot of help with your grammar. Work on the basics first and then we can help you with the "sports" part of sports writing.

    Sorry to be harsh, but there are a lot of recent grads who can write, yet can't find work.
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