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"Like having a mini-heartbeat in my crotch"

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by goalmouth, Oct 16, 2007.

  1. goalmouth

    goalmouth Active Member

    Dr. 90210 plumping women's G-spots with collagen, for better orgasms.

    The lede I never want to write:

    "David L. Matlock, M.D., stands poised before Rosemary Staltare's vagina, preparing to inject her G-spot with a dense dollop of collagen that will plump it to the size of a small stack of quarters."

  2. The Big Ragu

    The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

    That is wrong on multiple levels. What is the "it" that is getting plumped to the size of a small stack of quarters.

    I think I have my new euphemism for the year, though. "I'm standing poised..." Mmm hmmm.
  3. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    A small stack of quarters? She's gonna have to get a jockstrap for that thing.
  4. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    What is the "it?"

    Give you a hint -- it rhymes with a woman's name that isn't Mulva.
  5. StormSurge

    StormSurge Active Member

    GEORGE: The nickname. George. What is that? It's nothing. It's got no snap, no zip. I need a nickname that makes people light up.

    JERRY: You mean like...Liza!

    GEORGE: But I was thinking...T-bone.

    JERRY: But there's no "t" in your name. What about G-bone?

    GEORGE: There's no G-bone.

    JERRY: There's a g-spot.

    GEORGE: That's a myth.
  6. ArnoldBabar

    ArnoldBabar Active Member

    Umm, if you think the g-spot and the Delores are the same thing, you're probably doing it wrong.
  7. The Big Ragu

    The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

    David L. Matlock, M.D., stands poised to disagree.
  8. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    You don't know Delores.
  9. JR

    JR Active Member

    I love the name of his company: Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute.

    Only in America. :)
  10. The Big Ragu

    The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

    I'd give anything for one day spent answering phones at that company.

    "Hello. Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute. This is Ragu. How may I help you?"
  11. JR

    JR Active Member

    Stand poised, Ragu, stand poised.
  12. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Hi, Mr. 'Gu,

    I'd like to see about a dense dollop.
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