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Letterman: Top Ten Signs Your Newspaper is in Trouble

Discussion in 'Journalism topics only' started by jgmacg, May 1, 2007.

  1. jgmacg

    jgmacg Guest

    10 - "Covers all the news that happens within one block of the office."

    9 - "Today's exclusive: 'Nixon Dead!'"

    8 - "Reporter sent to jail for refusing to divulge a source...Oh, and he
    also killed a dude."

    7 - "All horoscopes: 'Now would be a good time to get out of the
    newspaper business."

    6 - "Paper's motto: 'Suck It'"

    5 - "Every 'hot gossip' item is about Jack Klugman."

    4 - "Managing editor and guy who wheels around breakfast? Same guy."

    3 - "Under 'weather,' it just reads 'yes.'"

    2 - "Instead of 'Garfield,' has a comic strip called 'Garfunkel.'"

    1 - "You endorsed Dennis Kucinich."

  2. Dammit, you beat me to it.
  3. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    11. Thank you for calling JRC; how may I direct your call?
  4. HejiraHenry

    HejiraHenry Well-Known Member

    Seems spot-on.
  5. boots

    boots New Member

    When your profession is the butt of a Letterman top 10 joke, you know its in trouble.
  6. micropolitan guy

    micropolitan guy Well-Known Member

    12. Thank you for calling the Regional Toning Center. Iowa papers, press one. California papers, press 2. New York papers, press 3 ...
  7. leo1

    leo1 Active Member

    uh, he has made fun of pretty much everyone over the last 25 years. don't sweat it.
  8. zagoshe

    zagoshe Well-Known Member

    13. People are leaving in mass numbers -- to take jobs at newspapers owned by Knight Ridder or Gannett
  9. boots

    boots New Member

    Yeah, but he's telling the truth, that's what's scary.
  10. 14) "No, I'm sorry. Mr. Black won't be available for the next seven to 25 years. Can I help you?"
  11. shotglass

    shotglass Guest

    Ahh, bullshit. It's a laugh, nothing more, nothing less.
  12. Mystery_Meat

    Mystery_Meat Guest

    15) this paper gets the much-sought after boots seal of approval
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