Let's just say........you were involved with a dominatrix.......

"The safety word is 'banana'"

 

"I love you."

 

I'm NOT with you, Leather!!!

 

Madame Vandersexxx: "Administer the testicle clamps!"


Cooper: "Ooh. Fluggengegeholen!"
Madame Vandersexxx: "Did you say fluggegecheimen?"
Cooper: "Yes! Yes! For the love of god, fluggengecheimen!"
Madame Vandersexxx: "Are you sure?"
Cooper: "Yes, please."
Madame Vandersexxx: "As you wish. Brung on the fluggeecheimen!"

 

At least he got a shirt.

 

Love it. That's the first thing I thought of.

 

Great thread!

I had a geometry teacher in high school that was fucking. Crazy. Weird. I dunno where to begin with him, but on weekends, he made extra money being a masked bad guy in local area pro wrestling.

And sometimes, just for fun, we'd play peaknuckle with him in between classes. I'd watch the strongest boys in high school try to break him down, and they couldn't get him to even slightly wince. He'd say "is that all you got? Is that all you got?!?"

Then all of a sudden, with a simple flick of the wrist, you'd be on the floor writhing in pain. He'd look down at you with an evil grin and utter "Say buttermilk...c'mon...say buttermilk."

I tried it once and believe you me, "buttermilk" is about the last word in the dictionary you can get out of your mouth when you're in appendicitis-like pain.

Moral of the story: keep your safe word monosyllabic.

 

Safest bet on the planet.

 

OK, for F_T, the thread is....


Let's just say........you were involved with a dom.......

 

So I was 28, I went to my neighborhood bar after work, I was wearing a necktie, it was after midnight, the bar was not busy that night. I had never seen the two women at the bar before, but we had a nice, easy conversation, and one of them pointed to my tie and said, "We're going to have to tie you up with that later." I laughed it off, didn't really think much about it. At closing time, they came home with me to continue the party, one was 35 and one was 45. Nothing much happened except us getting drunker, and a few kisses with the 35-year-old, except she either had a boyfriend or had just broken up with one, and she retired to the bathroom for a while to cry. The 45-year-old and I talked for a while until the other one came out of the bathroom, and then they both left. It was 3 or 4 a.m. A week or so later, I walked into the same bar and the younger one was there and she yells out, "THAT'S HIM! THAT'S THE GUY WHO WANTED US TO TIE HIM UP!" People laughed, I probably blushed, but I shrugged it off and sat at the bar. I lived in a wild part of town and probably there were people in the bar who liked being tied up, no major stigma to it, I guess, because I kept going to that bar till I moved away. Never saw the two women there again.

 

This thread reeks of fail
No matter what, forever
Sees no point in it

 

I would only allow someone to tie me up if I could completely trust them. There are stories of people being robbed or murdered by dominatrix hookers.