Let this be a lesson to all you rogue satellites

WASHINGTON (AP) — The Pentagon says a Navy missile hit the spy satellite it was targeting over the Pacific Ocean and says it should know Thursday whether the spacecraft’s fuel tank was destroyed as planned.

 

By rogue satellites, do you mean Iran, Russia and North Korea?

 

No, I mean orbiting buckets of bolts that might wish to rain terror and toxic badness on our proud land. Let this be a lesson to all of them. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED, BITCHES!

 

Ouch. I was watching the lunar eclipse, and something just hit me square in the noggin. For eternity, I'll now be known as the dude with NASA spelled backward in his forehead.

 

So we'll just call you "ASAN" from now on?

And why weren't they blowing the whole damn thing up instead of just the fuel tank?

 

I HOPE WE DIDN'T UNWITTINGLY UNLEASH THE EVIL ROBOTS!



ARRRRGH!

 

Nice sweater vest!

 

Is the robot wearing a skirt?

 

I like Conan's attempts to bring down the rogue raccoon better.

 

We have to bomb the rogue satellites up there so we don't have to fight them down here.

 

The rest of it will burn up in reentry, the fuel tank needed to be taken care of.

 

As a guy with a B.S. in aerospace engineering, including a couple semesters of astrodynamics, I have a hard time believing:

1) They were actual able to target the fuel tank specifically. Closing speed was something like 20,000 mph.
2) There's any concern about what survived and what didn't. Closing speed was something like 20,000 mph.