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Kenny Rogers making threats

Discussion in 'Sports and News' started by MU_was_not_so_hard, Oct 26, 2006.

  1. MU_was_not_so_hard

    MU_was_not_so_hard Active Member

    Kenny Rogers Vows to Kill Anyone Who Takes a Picture of His Hand in Game 6

    Detroit Tigers pitcher Kenny Rogers promised today that he will personally disembowel any cameraman or photographer who dares take pictures of his pitching hand during his next World Series start. The warning is just the latest chapter in what has been a long and contentious relationship between the pitcher and members of the visual media.

    “I f—king hate photographers and cameramen,” said Rogers. “Always have. I’m like the Amish or Indians that way. Except I don’t think they’ll steal my soul. Quite the opposite. I think I’ll steal their soul when I murder them and then send their soul right to hell. Don’t think I won’t do it. I’ll steal their soul, piss on it, and then send it to hell.”

  2. KP

    KP Active Member

    Psychiatric Ward, please pick up line 101.
  3. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member

  4. BYH

    BYH Active Member

  5. Double J

    Double J Active Member

    Great column by Verducci. And this is probably a d_b, but Bill Simmons came right out on Wednesday and accused Rogers of loading up (himself, not necessarily the ball):


    Does anyone else believe that he planted that brown stuff on his left hand to deflect attention away from the fact that he fits every possible profile of a steroids/greenies guy? I mean, let's say you just returned from a three-week safari in Africa and I told you, "Yo, there's this veteran pitcher in his early 40s with a storied track record for choking in big games, only now he's working on a 22-inning scoreless streak in October and punctuating each start by screaming after every out and stomping around like a crazy homeless guy trying to clear out a bus stop?" Wouldn't your first thought be, "What's he taking?" Instead, we're worried about some mud on his hand? Somebody make this guy pee in a cup, please.
  6. Ben_Hecht

    Ben_Hecht Active Member

    Preppy Bill is hardly the first to make this accusation about this specific subject . . .
  7. Smasher_Sloan

    Smasher_Sloan Active Member

    Having dealt with Rogers, I seriously doubt if he's capable of constructing such a complicated scenario. Much more likely he just stuck some pine tar on his hand to cheat.

    If greenies made you pitch better, there would have been at least one no-hitter every day in the '70s.
  8. 85bears

    85bears Member

    You guys do know the "Sports Pickle" is a satire site, right? Like the Onion.
  9. cranberry

    cranberry Well-Known Member

    Yes, just like the Onion, only it's not so funny.
  10. Bill Horton

    Bill Horton Active Member

    you're kidding, right? That's where I get all my sports news and research.
  11. fmrsped

    fmrsped Active Member

    You mean Rogers didn't actually threaten all the photographers at the game with death adn get away with it?

    I can't believe I was so duped.

    Fucking jackass.
  12. Football_Bat

    Football_Bat Well-Known Member

    Sadly, this was 100% fiction — and 0% unbelievable.
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