Katie Holmes is a Free Agent

...Or so says several reports that came off the Breaking News app on my iPad. Seems like five years of Tom Cruise was enough for her.

 

Katie Holmes crawled to freedom through five years of craziness that I can't even imagine. Or maybe I don't want to. Five years. That's just short of half a decade.
Katie Holmes.
The girl who waded through a river of nutburgers and came out sane on the other side.

 

Much like an athlete's wife, she maxed out her earning potential. From a National Enquirer story five years ago:

Just by reaching the one-year milestone, Katie is guaranteed up to $70 million, said the source. “If the marriage lasts five years, she could get an estimated $10 million extra, which would bump her divorce payoff up to $80 million,” added the source.

“If Tom and Katie are still happily married after a decade, she would collect a possible $100 million should the relationship later collapse.

http://www.celebitchy.com/7512/about_katie_holmes_600_million_wedding_contract/

I wouldn't put up with all that shit for another $20 million.

Guess now we'll find out if Suri is an actual person or just a photo compilation, though.

 

Laser or Gillette Fusion?

 

She's going to make one hell of a primetime interview down the road. Add what she could bank in a tell-all book, and Ms. Holmes is primed to make a buck or $30 million in the next 2-3 years.

 

Corrected for historical accuracy.

 

I'm sure the pre-nup has a non-compete clause.

Does L. Ron get custody of Siri

 

That's a beard joke, right?

 

Not that she ever had the earning potential of Julia Roberts or Reese Witherspoon, but I would argue that her marriage probably killed her acting career.

 

I read something a few years ago that said that Cruise would likely cut her loose before they got to the 10-year mark because there's some California law that kicks in at that point. The article also said that Cruise left Kidman right before the 10-year anniversary hit.

What's interesting is Kidman almost never sees the kids she adopted with Cruise. I wonder if that will be the case with Suri.

I doubt any tell-alls are coming. I'm sure she's signed her life away and would be sued into the ground if she ever says anything.

 

No way. Get her in some dark movie where she's doing frontal and she'll be back.

 

Maybe she can rise from the dead in The Gift 2: Electric Boogaloo.