I've got a bat ...

What are silverfish?

 

A distgusting, but harmless, little silver insect.

I don't know how to upload pics, but here's a link to see one:
http://www.howtogetridofstuff.com/images/howtogetridofsilverfish/firebrat.jpg

I fucking hate them.

They live in humid environments, hence the bathroom habitat.

 

Wow, highly entertaining. If the exterminator doesn't call back tomorrow, call your county's cooperative extension office and ask for a critter specialist.

And in the meantime, he won't hurt you. I promise.

 

ding!

 

That should have a NSFA! on it. Not Safe For Angola! That picture creeped me out.

 

How could you screw this up? I didn't tell you to catch him in a wastepaper basket. I told you to grab him with a blanket.
Getting a bat out of the house is as easy as killing rats with a shovel. It should be impossible to screw up.

 

Garlic and a cross. It's actually a vampire.

 

You can also boil bats in coconut milk, like the Chamorros and other Micronesians do.
It's an acquired taste, though.

 

Now you see why I freaked out and IMMEDIATELY sprayed the entire bathroom.

I haven't dealt with those things in years (lived in a drier climate).

I HATE THEM.

 

If you see this all play out in a sitcom in a year or two, you'll know its genesis.

 

Would you feel bad if he was bit and got rabies?

 

Seinfeld!