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Is It Wrong to Avoid Handing Out Halloween Candy??

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by 3_Octave_Fart, Oct 29, 2013.

  1. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    I'm just not feeling it this year.
    Fart's all about the kids, but we got about 10 trick-or-treaters last year.
    Part of the resistance also is having a young nephew with a peanut allergy.
    Wife suggested Play-Dough, stamps, pencils and other small toys.
    But what kid wants that in their plastic pumpkin?
    I sure as hell didn't.
  2. playthrough

    playthrough Moderator Staff Member

    Wrong? Of course not. Just leave your porch light off.

    And yeah, forget the knick-knacks for trick-or-treaters. The parents want to mooch the bag too and we don't want any stinkin' Play-Dough.
  3. Riptide

    Riptide Well-Known Member

    The kids are still talking about the stuffed cabbage you gave out two years ago.
  4. RickStain

    RickStain Well-Known Member

    According to my parents who watched a video about Halloween at their fundamentalist church when I was a kid, it's wrong to want to hand out Halloween candy.
  5. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    You can eat Play-Doh too, dude.
    FART did it many times as a boy.
    It has a weird salinity to it.
  6. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    I got blessed with great teeth.
    I can't contribute to tooth decay, man.
    The obesity epidemic is a whole other matter.
    We need to give out carrots and celery, if anything.
  7. LongTimeListener

    LongTimeListener Well-Known Member

    Vegetarians give out celery sticks.
  8. BurnsWhenIPee

    BurnsWhenIPee Well-Known Member

    I think the only acceptable non-candy toys are things cool enough to make them too expensive to buy a ton of - things like Silly Putty and stuff like that. But no, nothing wrong with not wanting to give out candy to a Halloween crowd that may not reach double-digits.

    I'd keep the lights out and hit a movie with the wife.
  9. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    You should try my wife's eggplant.
    She must want me to have tremendous gastrointestinal health.
    Because I could have heated the entire house that night.
  10. spikechiquet

    spikechiquet Well-Known Member

    I usually buy a 12 pack of shitty canned beer (Miller Light, etc.) and sit out on the porch with candy the wife and I like and drink my good craft brews.
    Any parent that comes by dressed up with their kid gets offered a can. Good on them, not good enough to be offered a good beer...but a beer nonetheless.
  11. Iron_chet

    Iron_chet Well-Known Member

    First Halloween in a newly built neighborhood so not sure how many kids to expect as our street is only ~50% occupied.

    On our old street I usually gave out candy while my wife took the kids. It is usually cold out so I always had a bottle of Baileys to have a shot with any parents that I knew.

    Last year I had two 12 year old boys come to the door who were dressed as pimps. I asked them if they knew what pimp colors are, that being green for the money and gold for the honeys.

    They were so impressed with this tidbit that I received high fives as well as thank-yous for the candy.
  12. Wenders

    Wenders Well-Known Member

    I'm working Halloween night. Problem solved.
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