Is it worth it? Marriage/job question

Damn, where did all this agreement come from?

 

Because there is really nothing to argue about. The guy has a choice. He can apply or not apply. If he applies and get it, then he has decisions to make. To me he's worrying about nothing. It appears that he's unsure if wants to make a move.

 

out - there's been a lotta love floating around the board this past week.

 

Wow. I didn't expect this thread to keep going. Thanks, everyone.

I suppose I have another update, as the truth came out last night: She doesn't want any part of that place, which really doesn't surprise me. She'll support me if I apply but no, she said she wouldn't want to go.

Which brings me back to my original question. I wasn't asking if I should tell my wife - I don't keep secrets from her - I was asking if I should even bother to apply because I know she would bite her tongue if I did it.

Songbird, I think it took the wind out of my sails because I sort of saw it wasn't what she wanted, even if she was supportive. And, in truth, now that my life involves a wife and children my priorities have changed. Maybe that isn't my dream job anymore.

Anyway, enough being wishy washy. I'll apply for the job. As a compromise I'm also applying for one closer to where she wants to live. Now I'm done talking and just need to do it. Let the chips fall ...

Thanks guys.

 

It's a toughie for sure. I know my wife didn't WANT to move from our last stop, but she bit the bullet and came with me. There were definitely some hard times at first, days when I felt so guilty for making here leave her life behind.

But now she's got a better job than she had at our old place, we've got a better house. she's got more friends. It worked out. She's probably happier here than she was at our old place.

I guess what I'm saying is, sometimes women don't know what's good for 'em (kidding).

No, seriously, sometimes in life you don't know if you're going to like something until you try it. I wouldn't rule something out because you think your wife maybe quite possibly potentially won't like it. If the new job sucks too bad, you can always move back. Happens all the time.

 

sexist statement aside, nice post.

 

just to be clear: The sexist statement was a joke.

 

The important thing to remember is that it's just a job...

I've seen way too many marriages end of friends in the business who don't know how to balance the demands of our jobs and having a family.

I'm in a situation where my wife has a very good job that pretty much prevents me from leaving where I'm working right now. Will that prevent me from moving up the ranks (not that I'm complaining)? To an extent, but I care a hell of a lot more about my wife and kids than I do about some promotion or job that may or may not ever come. I'm at complete peace with that.

I have a lot of friends who uproot their families from good situations because they can get a slight promotion. I know a lot of people who leave jobs and then quickly find out that their spouse is very unhappy in a new location.

You have to be smart about it and if you take the feelings of your spouse into constant consideration, you should be OK.

 

And a lot of hate, depending on where you look.

And boots, you kinda missed the point of the post, but Tom got it. But hey, you got to write the same thing again.

Outing alert: Boots is Jim Rome. Neither one can stop repeating themselves.

 

No you missed the point of the post just to try to make a joke. Try again.

 

go with the love, out, go with the love.

 

Don't apply for a job anywhere that she doesn't want to move. It's as simple as that.
Your family's happiness is more important than the job.