I'm Peter King and Your Not

Boom_70 · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

One day, I pray I'm on a flight next to the bloated King, his vast butt shoehorned into an aisle seat while I get the window view. I swear I'd eat the entire contents of the trolley, emitting disgusting noises from every orifice for the duration, accidentally spilling my red wine onto his expensive laptop, whilst talking loudly to anyone who would listen about my hatred for his beloved Boston Red Sox. Of course, I'd need a lot of bathroom breaks, too.

King's columns are still somehow fixating, but like a road accident for entirely the wrong reasons. I don't read for his insights any longer -- if I want information allied to humor, the ever-excellent Dr. Z is the man. King is there to raise the blood pressure, to spark another round of bile and vitriol. I've never hated a public figure more than I hate Peter King. I don't think I think that -- I know I think that.

jgmacg · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

Boom_70 said:

I've never hated a public figure more than I hate Peter King. I don't think I think that -- I know I think that.
Click to expand...

Then why not just slug the thread that way next time and save everybody two pages of foreplay?

goalmouth · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

Boom's rips on PK are a highlight of this site. And this thread, while nostalgic, only lightly touches on the SportsJournalists.com ouevre when it comes to all things King -- the legendary doctored photos of Mary Beth, or the classic play-by-play of PK stuffing his cakehole at a Patriots game.

Boom won't stop until King comes on here under his own name to defend himself. Mark it down.

Piotr Rasputin · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

21 said:

Last Tuesday afternoon, my daughter Mary Beth and I were preparing to fly from South Bend, Ind., to Cincinnati on a Delta Connection flight. We planned to continue on to Newark from there, and then drive home. We got to the airport at 2:45 p.m. for the 4 p.m. flight. At about 3:25, Mary Beth said she was going to get yogurt pretzels. "Hurry back," I told her. Well, she tarried, and finally, at 3:40, I told the agent to page her, which he did, and then told the guy I was running to find her. I found her. We sprinted back, went through security, and arrived at the gate at 3:46. "Flight's closed," the gate agent announced. Rather than explain anything -- you have to board within 15 minutes of flight time or you risk surrendering your seat -- his co-agent commenced putting us on the next flight. The 4 p.m. plane would have put us on the ground in Newark at 7:40; the next flight wouldn't get us there until 12:30 a.m. Mary Beth begged for them to open the door. The two guys said nothing. Stone cold. The second agent just continued typing furiously. I saw how unresponsive they were and knew we were cooked. I knew the flight was full, and there were two standbys, or more, and figured he'd just given away our seats at 3:45 on the nose, even with me running to get Mary Beth.

We'd gotten to bed at 3:30 Monday morning because of a two-hour, 48-minute Delta Connection delay in Cincinnati Sunday night, then Mary Beth stayed with two students in a dorm at Notre Dame Monday night, and heaven knows how much sleep was had that night. She was fried. Anyway, I finally spoke up and said, basically, that you guys saw me run to get her, and the South Bend airport is no bigger than a postage stamp, and, really, you knew I'd be right back, and you gave away the two seats to standbys anyway? "Sir, if you don't want seats on the next flight, you can take your business elsewhere," Idiot No. 2 said. I simmered. He printed out the tickets for the later flight, handed them to me, and the biggest two aviation numbskills in Indiana history walked outside to close up the commuter flight.

An older fellow who was in the waiting area for another flight then walked up to the counter and proceeded to start screaming at my Delta foes, who stopped in their tracks. "What you just did is the worst thing I've ever seen done by an airline!'' Mr. Neutral Onlooker yelled. "I will never fly Delta again! I will tell people I know never to fly Delta again! You ought to be ashamed of yourselves!'' To which Idiot number 2 replied: "Would you like us to call security?" He didn't have to. A female security agent came over and asked what the problem was, and Mary Beth told her how evil the two clowns behind the counter were. At this point, the two agents walked outside, and then the first guy stood behind the plate-glass door and made faces at us -- raised eyebrows and phony smiles, head moving smugly from side to side -- and announced loudly and mockingly, in a sing-song way: "Good-bye! Good-bye! Enjoy your flights!''

The later flight began its taxi to the runway at 3:55. Western civilization was saved. Gold stars to all involved! You were five minutes early!

You know, when you fly a lot, as I do, you need to have thick skin. Things happen. I waited out a five-hour delay in Orlando last summer because the crew didn't show up. I didn't make a peep. Things happen. But 99 percent of the the time, you're treated with some kind of common decency, even in the longest of delays. And here are two uncommunicative, unresponsive, totally unprofessional slugs, who can't spend 10 seconds explaining what happened but who can threaten to call security and mock our anger. All they had to do, even one of them, was to explain exactly what happened, which they never did, and say they're sorry, but rules are rules, and we had to be there at 3:45, and we weren't. I would have been angry, but not volcanic. Things happen, but in 24 years of flying for my job, I've never been treated like this, and I will not accept being treated like this.

The only thing you can do in a case like this is to not fly the airline. And so my little protest will be just that, a little protest. But it will be real. For the next year, until Feb. 23, 2005, I will not fly Delta. My guess is that will cost them maybe $5,000 in business. If Mary Beth goes to college in a town serviced by Delta, she will not fly the airline for one year either. I'm sure Delta will get a chuckle out of this protest. My only hope is the airline disciplines the two numbskulls -- I just wish I'd gotten their names, but Delta can figure out easily enough who they are -- for costing the company a few G's.

Click to expand...

What a fucking bottom-feeder.

I wish he had named who "Idiot No. 2" so he could have been sued for defamation.

His insights are rarely worth a shit these days, his column is unreadable, and I can't believe there are enough ignorant football fans in this country who prefer him over a Dr. Z.

Boom_70 · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

By popular demand - the now famous Tejada story :

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/inside_game/peter_king/news/2003/03/31/mmqb/

This is going to do nothing but make you envious of me, and so I'm not sure if I should write it or not, but I relate it only to let you know how thankful I am for the charmed life I lead, and to remind you that the next time I complain about anything job-related you need to put me in my place and tell me what a fool I am.

Last Wednesday, at the conclusion of the league meetings, I had a 5:15 p.m. flight on Continental from Phoenix to Newark. Being the baseball nerd that I am, I decided to stop in at the Arizona-Oakland exhibition game in Phoenix for a few innings, in large part because Randy Johnson was hurling. And so here came Miguel Tejada to the dish. Cool moment.

Reigning NL Cy Young Award winner versus reigning AL Most Valuable Player. Here's the pitch. Long drive to right ... twisting ... curving foul ... deep ... and 10 feet foul, over the fence. I thought -- and I have my reasons why -- what a good thing it would be to have that ball.

There was a moderate crowd on this toasty Arizona afternoon. And, after the inning, I walked out to the bleachers down the right-field line and looked over the fence that stood between the main ballpark and the back fields where the A's train. I asked a fan where the ball was that Tejada hit, and he pointed to the first main field, where a ball sat between home plate and the first-base bag. At the same time, a kid, maybe about 7, asked some other fans where the ball was; I heard him. And those fans pointed to four foul balls sitting in sort of no-man's land between the backstop on the first field and the fence where I was. I knew this couldn't be true, because the ball went over the fence barely foul, not 35 feet foul the way it would have had to if it was where the kid thought it was. And so I walked to the area outside the right-field stands where a guard and an A's official were making sure no fans got down to the lower fields and the players' parking lot. I asked if I might be able to get the Johnson-Tejada ball. The official said no problem, and I walked down, past the alerted guard, and onto the pristine field to get the ball. Behind me, all of a sudden, I heard the running footsteps of the kid, who'd apparently snuck behind me and got past the guard, too, and he scrambled past the backstop to get the ball he was sure was the one Tejada hit. I picked up the True Ball, and I told the kid: "I'm sure you've got the one Tejada hit," just so he'd feel good about it. And when the guard saw him walking back up the ramp toward the stadium, he tried to stop the kid, but he was too quick and slipped back into the stadium. (Just like I'm sure I would have done if I was a kid and had an MVP foul ball.) I thanked Matt sincerely, told him the ball would be put to good use, and went back to watch a couple more innings before catching my plane.

And now you know why I have the best job on earth.

imjustagirl2 · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

That story pisses me off even more every time I read it.

What a self-important douchebox.

21 · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

Behind me, all of a sudden, I heard the running footsteps of the kid, who'd apparently snuck behind me and got past the guard, too, and he scrambled past the backstop to get the ball he was sure was the one Tejada hit. I picked up the True Ball, and I told the kid: "I'm sure you've got the one Tejada hit," just so he'd feel good about it.
Click to expand...

You just cannot make that up.

Bubbler · Sep 19, 2006

Re: Hey PK - Next Time Say Please

Boom_70 said:

By popular demand - the now famous Tejada story :

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/inside_game/peter_king/news/2003/03/31/mmqb/

This is going to do nothing but make you envious of me, and so I'm not sure if I should write it or not, but I relate it only to let you know how thankful I am for the charmed life I lead, and to remind you that the next time I complain about anything job-related you need to put me in my place and tell me what a fool I am.

Last Wednesday, at the conclusion of the league meetings, I had a 5:15 p.m. flight on Continental from Phoenix to Newark. Being the baseball nerd that I am, I decided to stop in at the Arizona-Oakland exhibition game in Phoenix for a few innings, in large part because Randy Johnson was hurling. And so here came Miguel Tejada to the dish. Cool moment.

Reigning NL Cy Young Award winner versus reigning AL Most Valuable Player. Here's the pitch. Long drive to right ... twisting ... curving foul ... deep ... and 10 feet foul, over the fence. I thought -- and I have my reasons why -- what a good thing it would be to have that ball.

There was a moderate crowd on this toasty Arizona afternoon. And, after the inning, I walked out to the bleachers down the right-field line and looked over the fence that stood between the main ballpark and the back fields where the A's train. I asked a fan where the ball was that Tejada hit, and he pointed to the first main field, where a ball sat between home plate and the first-base bag. At the same time, a kid, maybe about 7, asked some other fans where the ball was; I heard him. And those fans pointed to four foul balls sitting in sort of no-man's land between the backstop on the first field and the fence where I was. I knew this couldn't be true, because the ball went over the fence barely foul, not 35 feet foul the way it would have had to if it was where the kid thought it was. And so I walked to the area outside the right-field stands where a guard and an A's official were making sure no fans got down to the lower fields and the players' parking lot. I asked if I might be able to get the Johnson-Tejada ball. The official said no problem, and I walked down, past the alerted guard, and onto the pristine field to get the ball. Behind me, all of a sudden, I heard the running footsteps of the kid, who'd apparently snuck behind me and got past the guard, too, and he scrambled past the backstop to get the ball he was sure was the one Tejada hit. I picked up the True Ball, and I told the kid: "I'm sure you've got the one Tejada hit," just so he'd feel good about it. And when the guard saw him walking back up the ramp toward the stadium, he tried to stop the kid, but he was too quick and slipped back into the stadium. (Just like I'm sure I would have done if I was a kid and had an MVP foul ball.) I thanked Matt sincerely, told him the ball would be put to good use, and went back to watch a couple more innings before catching my plane.

And now you know why I have the best job on earth.
Click to expand...

HOLY SHIT! How did I miss that? What a fucking dickbag! It's bad enough that he did it, but to write about as if we'd be envious of him for doing it? Fuck you, Peter King.

Boom, thank you for posting that, I recant the vitriol I spent yesterday on the Muslim thing. I join you in your fatwa against PK.

slappy4428 · Sep 19, 2006

You know, it's unhealthy to obsess on the arrogant, oblivious pomposity of a columnist....

The Big Ragu · Sep 19, 2006

I laugh every time I read that. Man, it gets funnier with age.

indiansnetwork · Sep 19, 2006

That truly is one of the single most selfish acts a sportswriter can do. I really liked Peter King until this pompous jerk wrote this article about how cool he is and how he has special privileges that others don't enjoy. At the same time I look at this as possible being a incident that might make him a better person because of the backlash he will receive. Maybe he was crying for help and maybe he knew one good way to get it is to write about what a horrible person he has become. One day he might write a article about how he helped a kid get a signed baseball from a hall of fame ball player or better yet does it but doesn't even write it at all.

slappy4428 · Sep 19, 2006

indiansnetwork said:

That truly is one of the single most selfish acts a sportswriter can do. I really liked Peter King until this pompous jerk wrote this article about how cool he is and how he has special privileges that others don't enjoy. At the same time I look at this as possible being a incident that might make him a better person because of the backlash he will receive. Maybe he was crying for help and maybe he knew one good way to get it is to write about what a horrible person he has become. One day he might write a article about how he helped a kid get a signed baseball from a hall of fame ball player or better yet does it but doesn't even write it at all.
Click to expand...

You know, that was like reading Cockdian

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I'm Peter King and Your Not

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