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I like paragraphs that are more than one sentence long

Discussion in 'Journalism topics only' started by sirvaliantbrown, Aug 6, 2007.

  1. Tim Sullivan

    Tim Sullivan Member

    Regarding the Old Man And The Sea: I think the lede sentence is brilliant, and I use it as an illustration whenever I speak to a class. Here's why: 84 days.

    Why is he still out there after so much failure? Why is he unable to catch a fish? What happens on the 85th day? Hemingway has engaged my curiosity, and that's pretty basic to storytelling. When I read this sentence to a class, I then ask students to draft a second sentence. I want them to tell me where the story goes from here, to use their imagination, to consider the details already presented and move the tale along. Usually, this gets a lively response, though one 8th grader suggested that in the next sentence the fisherman was killed by aliens, The End.

    I would be remiss, however, if I did not cite Dan Jenkins' riff on the great ledes of history as rewritten by the desk from ""You Gotta Play Hurt.""

    ""He was an old man (58 last October) who fished alone in a skiff (a small light sailing ship or rowboat) in the Gulf Stream (part of the Atlantic Ocean) and he had gone eight-four days (a new NCAA record) without taking a fish.''

    Almost as good as his Dickens:

    ""It was the best of times -- and, ironically -- the worst of times.''

    As far as great sportswriting ledes, I can't think of anything better than John Lardner's. (Maybe not verbatim, but close):

    ""Stanley Ketchel was 24 years old when he was fatally shot in the back by the common-law husband of the woman who was fixing his breakfast.''
     
  2. Jeremy Goodwin

    Jeremy Goodwin Active Member

    I don't mind long or short graphs. It all depends on the context.
    It's not always the case, but sometimes graphs are only one sentence because you need to stretch a story to fill a hole, and sometimes the only way to do that is to break up a paragraph to get that extra line.
     
  3. dooley_womack1

    dooley_womack1 Well-Known Member

    I think you need a mixture of long and short. You can have a longer one to set up a scene or give the feeling of an ordeal, then have a short kicker for a next graf. And in general, I like quotes to stand alone as a graf.
     
  4. Songbird

    Songbird Well-Known Member

    The great Joe DiMaggio would've come back with the whole damn fish.
     
  5. dooley_womack1

    dooley_womack1 Well-Known Member

    Ryan Sonner would have caught 84 fish in one day.
     
  6. jgmacg

    jgmacg Guest

    Ryan Sonner would have come back with Dimaggio tied to the side of the boat. And Marilyn on the seat next to him. Making him daiquiris.
     
  7. dooley_womack1

    dooley_womack1 Well-Known Member

    Then again, who wouldn't Marilyn do that for?
     
  8. That's fair. (Again, could've spent more time hunting for a good example.)
     
  9. Songbird

    Songbird Well-Known Member

    Ryan Sonner couldn't carry Manolin's jock strap.
     
  10. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    I never said it did. There are many uneven things I read that I don't like but which have glorious sections. There are good sentences, grafs, sections in TOMATS. I just don't think that one sentence, as an example of why we should all write one-sentence grafs, is one.

    Next time, try sticking with the argument instead of ranting.
     
  11. Mystery_Meat

    Mystery_Meat Guest

    Dick Schapp really liked that one too.
     
  12. Songbird

    Songbird Well-Known Member

     
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