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I just went in the ladies' room!

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Football_Bat, Jun 23, 2007.

  1. Football_Bat

    Football_Bat Well-Known Member

    I am the only one in the whole building. All the lights are off (other than my office), so I felt my way down the corridor where the bogs are located, and entered the first door that I could feel. All the lights were off, so I felt around one corner where the switch usually is. Wasn't there, so I felt the opposite wall, and there it was.

    I entered into a mecca of cleanliness. Carpet on the floor of the foyer (THERE WAS A FREAKIN' FOYER!) with a freaking COUCH and mirrors everywhere. Even a industrial-size bottle of nail polish remover which someone had left there.

    And the place smelt great. I stood up and did my biz and left.

    Mens' rooms are the skankiest place in the universe, once you think about it. You walk in, never look anyone in the eye, unreel your snake, go, and depart silently. Whereas, "going" on the distaff side is a universally shared event. Why is that?
     
  2. sportschick

    sportschick Active Member

    Gives us a chance to talk about your gross belching :D
     
  3. Angola!

    Angola! Guest

    F_B - Did you sit down to pee or something? You say, you stood up and then did your biz. Why weren't you standing?
    Anyway, one time the power went down at my old shop and I accidentally went in the women's restroom, I couldn't figure out where the urinals were so I used a stall and didn't realize what had happened until later on.
    Also, who hasn't used a women's restroom at a bar in their lifetime?
     
  4. dmc

    dmc Guest


    Probably because the "going" part is done in private.

    And this--"I stood up and did my biz" does not lend itself to this--"I entered into a mecca of cleanliness"
     
  5. Moderator1

    Moderator1 Moderator Staff Member

    Smelt?

    Threads like this are what give us are great name! I can't imagine the thought process that went into wizzing in the women's room and thinking, "I must rush back and start a thread."

    Great site, useful for the biz.
    Uh, using the ladies' room?

    Yeah, I'm being a rag. Deal with it. I smelt.
     
  6. novelist_wannabe

    novelist_wannabe Well-Known Member

    I dunno. I've been in lots of men's rooms where there seemed to be some smelting going on ...

    I've done this twice by accident. Once was in Germany. Didn't know the difference between Damen and Herren back then and guessed wrong. As I came out a German girl coming in laughed at me. Other time was at an outlet mall when a sudden onset hit me and I took the first door without looking at which sign was on it. Thought the presence of a rocking chair was curious. I got sat down and was bombing the harbor when a mother and a couple of kids walked in. So I just sat in the stall until they left. Felt like under cover work or something.

    BTW, TTIU until Jones drops in and makes his contribution.
     
  7. SoSueMe

    SoSueMe Active Member

    Was at a ball game on opening day and two of the mens rooms were out of order. The lines were enormous! So guys started going in the lock-the-door, single-toilet-and-change-table family ones. Then, those lines lengthened and it was off to the ladies room. That lasted about two innings before a couple women complained just in line. So women started escorting their husbands, boyfriends, friends into the washroom. Finally, security had to be posted at each restroom door.
     
  8. three_bags_full

    three_bags_full Well-Known Member

    I've done this twice ... both times in restaurants.

    The first, and the worst, offense was at a Chinese buffet joint about three years ago. I turned the corner the wrong way and pushed my way into the women's restroom and began serching for the urinals. It was my first time at the place, so the absence of urinals didn't immediately trip my alarms. Even when a woman popped out of the stall, my radar didn't go off. She put one hand beside her face, as if to shield herself from me. It wasn't until I completely passed the woman and turned to enter the stall that I realized that I'd just passed a woman.

    I executed an about face and left, face red as sweet and sour sauce, at a double time.
     
  9. Hysterical.
     
  10. leo1

    leo1 Active Member

    once when i was a kid i opened the door to the ladies room in a department store and everyone started shrieking. i freaked out and ran away even though the men's room was right next door and i had to go really badly.
     
  11. PhilaYank36

    PhilaYank36 Guest

    Well played, my friend.

    Not only have I taken a leak in the ladies room, I did it in the sink. I was at a formal with my baseball team with the girls field hockey & lacrosse teams. Incredibly, disgracefully plastered after a shit-load of gin & tonics, shots of Jack and plenty o' Yuengling. Anyway, I had to break the seal and there was a line going into the men's room. I wasn't in a particularly patient mood, so I high-tail it to the women's room. Some of the lacrosse girls are in and just start laughing. All the stalls are in use, so they point me in the right direction, I unleash my meat and drain the lizard right there and then. I've never heard such hard, forceful laughter in my life.
     
  12. wickedwritah

    wickedwritah Guest

    Our, not are.

    Otherwise, this response cracked me up.
     
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