I just gave somebody road rage...

Hey, them's the brakes.

 

Good tale, BigPern, I enjoyed every twist, turn, stop and start.

Congrats to you and to Jay for keeping your cool. I'm afraid that, on occasion, I'm inclined not to do that when I'm confronted by the road rager. It's only slightly better, I know, to be the one who gets ticked off as a reaction to the first ticked-off jerk. And certainly not the safest. Fortunately, I now have developed a default mode of thinking about my lovely bride and our child in such moments, and how none of what's happening on the road at that instant should get in the way of me getting home to them. Works pretty darn well.

That said, I'll share this:

A buddy of mine taught me a great reflexive gesture to those who flip the bird, honk, make the throat-slash move or whatever: He catches their eye and then blows them a kiss. Abso-freaking-lutely infuriates most of the road ragers. Good times!

 

That's outstanding.

 

I understand the impulse for road rage, having felt it many times. But I never truly understand the follow-through on that impulse. Ok, so another driver makes a shitty maneuver. Happens every minute. What use is it taking off after the person? To teach them a "lesson"? I hear this phrase all the time. "I went after him to teach him a lesson." Yeah, ok. You're so very bad-ass. Odds are that no lessons are meted out, no one's doing anything physical, just a bunch of empty gestures that could escalate and get really dangerous, involving other drivers.
Plus, you don't know who you're fucking with. I had one person pull up aside me and point his finger as though he had a gun. Took the nearest turn and booked the Christ out of there.

 

I had a guy a few weeks back who decided to cut me off on the highway in two consecutive lanes. I honked my horn at him to let him know that there was no need for it, and at the very least, use a turn signal or something so I don't have to slam on the breaks twice in six seconds on the highway.

He finally pulls over to the middle lane to let me pass, puts his cell phone down and is screaming at me, "I'm a lawyer! I'm a lawyer!" I smiled and shook my head. If he's a lawyer, he knows it's illegal to not only cut people off on the highway with no turn signal, but it's also illegal around here to use a phone while driving, too.

 

Back in college, my roommate and I were going out to eat. Right before we get to the restaurant, we roll up on a construction zone where two lanes merge into one. I put my blinker on, wait my turn, and it looks like the guy in my blind spot is going to let me in. As I start to get over, though, he speeds up and cuts me off.
Annoyed, I snap and yell, "ASSHOLE!" at the top of my lungs.
My mistake was doing it with the windows down.
The car gets about two lengths ahead and comes to a dead stop. This incredibly ripped dude hops out of the passenger's seat and starts walking toward my car, saying "What did you say!? What did you say!?"
I start crapping my pants and apologizing for flying off the handle. This guy obviously would have left me a bloody stain on the road. Fortunately, right about the time he was getting to the front of my car, his buddy caught up to him and got him back into his car. They drove off, and I spent my entire dinner wondering if I was going to end up with a brick through my windshield.

 

I am very impressed by how little wasted testosterone is coursing through our board contributors' veins. Most of us here seem to take the deferential, reasoned, pacifist and smart role of backing down vs. the ragers.

Seriously, given all the reasons we might have to be agitated in our jobs, it's nice that we don't pay that forward in some brutish way. Or maybe we're all just girly-man wise guys and gals.

 

My father once was driving home from work (he had about a 40 mile commute). When he got home, another car pulled up to him a minute later and a guy got out and started screaming about how my dad cut him off 45 minutes earlier. Guy eventually leaves.

My mom then yelled at my dad (pre-cell phone era) for not just driving to the police station.

 

I fully acknowledge that I have road rage issues. I swear and honk and flip people off. I don't cut people off on purpose because I don't trust them to not hit me (and I like my car, and a working body).

However, I have followed people.

I ha(d/ve) no intention of hurting them or doing anything else. Not even so much "teaching them a lesson," it (was/is) mostly just to fuck with 'em and scare the daylights out of them. I've probably only done it a half-dozen times (granted, they've all been in the past three years and, for a good chunk of that, I lived in the "hood").

 

I'll never understand how someone can get THAT bent out of shape over traffic and what they expect to accomplish by putting themselves in harm's way.

 

I do the same thing. Although I suppose it's more effective coming from another guy.

I have gotten followed to my destination a few times (I must be a shitty driver ... ah well, I am female ) and luckily some of those times have coincided with me having my ball gear in the back. Or my dog. Or both.

Nothing like a bat in one hand, cellphone in the other and a barking, 100-pound dog trying to get out of the truck to scare the shit out of someone.

 

nm