I am not Freqpposter. but

I can see a new, edgy slogan for zoos across North America

The zoo: Getting animal husbandry right

 

You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals.

 

If she says the animals are cute, tell her they're smart. If she says they're smart, tell her they're cute.

 

You just have to be sure to let her know by anagram on Facebook to meet you at the monkey cage at 5.

 

"Wanna see an elephant's trunk?"

 

"No, underneath. In front of the tail. ... Mommy said it's nothing."

"Son, I've spoiled that woman ... "

 

The settings are endless.

Zoo
Toddler playgrounds before noon but it helps if you have a toddler.
Library story time in the mornings.
Target on a hot day, before late afternoon.
Any organic grocery store.
Dance class.
After lunch and before dinner at any country club.
Volunteering at your kid's school (teachers and stay at home moms)
Youth soccer and baseball games. Basketball has too much action.
Not so much bookstores anymore - Kindle and Nook ruined that.
TJ Maxx
Any high-end department store shoe section.

 

Love the qualifier there. It also helps if you drive a sedan of some sort instead of a windowless van.

 

Hey, vans have wheel wells, too!

 

The only kind of sex you're gonna get if you show up minus a toddler is ass-raped down at the county lock-up...

 

He'd tell the physical inmates that they have a nice, sensitive side, and tell the effeminate ones that they have nice muscles.

 

Freqposter is a good husband and even better spouse.