How to get out?

Here's an idea... perhaps you can take a leave of absence for two or three months and see if that helps.

There may be other problems with your relationship, and getting away from the paper might be a way to see that. I don't know about your relationship, of course, but it may be your work as a sports editor may not be the only problem or even the main problem. That is what you would have to find out.

Here's another thought... perhaps you could volunteer at your child's school - that might give you some time around her and would be a way to be around other people.

 

This is a topic near and dear to my heart, Sportswriter10. I've been in your shoes, and it's a hard pill to swallow to give up one thing you love for another. For me, I couldn't make journalism and family life work ... so I gave up newspapering. I think, first of all, you should define what it is about journalism that you enjoy doing so much. Is it covering games? Writing? Layout? All of the above? For me, writing and reporting was the biggest allure. If that's true for you, I would consider going to the news side for a reporting job. Sure, news reporters can work nasty hours, too. But my experience is that you can have a much more normal life. It sounds like you are at a mid-size daily. What shifts do news reporters work there? If it's afternoons, is there a smaller daily or even a weekly that could offer better hours? It doesn't sound like money is the issue for you ... a smaller paycheck is worth a solid marriage and family, trust me.

If you decide to leave journalism, keep an open mind. There are other jobs outthere that you can do besides PR. I still use my writing/reporting skills, but I'm about as far away from journalism as you can get. Good luck. I hope it works out for you.

 

Here's the deal, Mr. 10...

I'm young. I'm not married. I'm in no hurry to change any of those things. And because of that, I can assume a work all hours, move to a better job at a moment's notice, let nothing stand between me and my goals lifestyle

But in the unlikely event that I end up with wife and child, it stops the moment that it has to. When you've got a family, it ceases to be just your life. You've got others along for the ride.

I've seen the alternative. I've worked with people who feel they can juggle it all, only to watch it come down with a resounding thud. I've even worked with those who had the job way ahead of the wife and kid on the priority list. They're the ones who seem miserable no matter how good or how prestigious the job is, because even if they're lucky to not lose their marriage, they really don't have anything to come home to.

To a man, the happiest, most fulfilled guys I know in this business are the ones who keep a constant eye on the home front. This doesn't mean you need to abandon everything. There's a middle ground. But do you really want to risk one day covering a kickass beat, only to come home to an empty apartment? Or plop down on the hotel bed after getting back from the game, only to have no one to call?

Not saying that's in the cards for you. Just saying that, really, who cares in the long run if you have to cut back on something?

Good luck.

 

Your post sounds like the Tom Hanks character in 'Sleepless in Seattle' - calling the radio lonely heart guru. if your wife could read it she would fall back in love.

 

sprtswrtr10,

family comes first.