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Help FuerteJ pick a mail order bride!

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by imjustagirl2, Nov 27, 2006.

?

Which woman should FuerteJ pledge his undying devotion (and one-time only fee) for?

  1. Tatiana

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. Natalia

    5 vote(s)
    17.2%
  3. Z944 Anna

    1 vote(s)
    3.4%
  4. Elena

    5 vote(s)
    17.2%
  5. R497 Katerina

    1 vote(s)
    3.4%
  6. S846 Anna

    1 vote(s)
    3.4%
  7. Julia

    5 vote(s)
    17.2%
  8. A492 Katerina

    3 vote(s)
    10.3%
  9. Victoria

    5 vote(s)
    17.2%
  10. Ludmila

    3 vote(s)
    10.3%
  1. Sam Mills 51

    Sam Mills 51 Well-Known Member

    As if you need something else to spend your money on ... or garner your attention. ;D

    *ducking*
     
  2. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    I have a short attention span. Plus, if I saved up enough money, I could buy several and just convince them that "husband" means "houseboy" in America.
     
  3. If there's a two-header from Chernobyl, go for it!
     
  4. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    Nah, two mouths to feed with only two arms with which to clean my house. Not a good trade.
     
  5. Freelance Hack

    Freelance Hack Active Member

    I fear IJAG might be headed to Utah with her bevy of husbands and start her own polygamist colony.
     
  6. Sam Mills 51

    Sam Mills 51 Well-Known Member

    Stay Tuned for Tale of the Tape: Brigham Young vs. IJAG

    Anyone game? Elias? Nick Bakay?
     
  7. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    I've spoken of it for years. Sadly, I don't know that my meticulously-planned sojourn will ever happen.

    Drat.
     
  8. Bubbler

    Bubbler Well-Known Member

    That's why I voted for it. Fuerte needs some Russian robot love.
     
  9. Bubbler

    Bubbler Well-Known Member

    Holy mother of Christ, Fuerte, if she's a Russian journalist, she'll eat a gun from Vladimir Putin long before she ever gets a chance to mouth-love your privates.

    Step away from the future corpse, you don't need that in your life. Shit, you might even take a collateral damage-style cap in your ass too.
     
  10. FuerteJ

    FuerteJ Active Member

    Apparently Fuerte needs more than some Russian robot love.

    I'm still having a difficult choice here, folks. The fact that Natalia has a raven, I mean, can I turn that down?
     
  11. dooley_womack1

    dooley_womack1 Well-Known Member

    My choice had me at A492
     
  12. Bubbler

    Bubbler Well-Known Member

    My first impression scouting report:

    Tatiana -- Would NOT sue Girls Gone Wild for appearing in one, maybe all, of their DVDs.
    Natalia -- Ever seen those WWII documentaries with the old Russian women who are about 200 pounds and look like men? She'll be there at about t-minus 2010.
    Anna I -- You could be on the wrong end of the following headline, "Russian bride kills husband in self defense". She looks like she could engineer that, maybe with mob help.
    Elena -- She wants her man to "defend her", so start working on your jabs, because you know she's ready and willing to set up fights with other men over a shot of Stoli or something. You have just joined a sexual Toughman competition.
    Katerina I -- Robot.
    Anna II -- Definitely has potential to not only suck your neighbor's cock, but the mailman, your best friend, Mormon missionaries, dogs ...
    Julia -- Her rack is clearly fake. And since Russian fake boob technology languished in the late Cold War years, those boobs could very well be made out of crushed Faberge eggs or something. Steer clear of those Katusha rockets.
    Katerina II -- Not worthy of working in a hillbilly peep show booth, but my Nostradamus-like soothsaying ability sees that in her future.
    Victoria -- If you ask her whether she's ever fucked someone who has had the following occupations: bartender, bouncer, bar DJ -- her answer will be an unequivocal, "Da!"
    Ludmilla -- Most honest of the bunch. She's a whore, she's a golddigger (she wants a man 30-60? Yeah, that's all about romance), she's using you as a stepping stone to get to richer oilier beau hunks. Open a secret bank account, get all of your sexual experimentation out of your system and turn her on her merry way.
     
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