Hasselhoff roast on NOW

It gets far funnier.

I figured this thread would be at three pages by now. Where art thou, SJ Nation?

 

I stopped working on tab stories to watch the replay...
Lampinelli was really good ---usually it's OK...

 

I don't know why but I'm just not a roast guy.

I guess it's because too often on these things the roastee has no idea who half the people roasting him are -- unless he's seen the same guys (Ross, Giraldo, etc.) roasting other people they don't know.

 

Just finished watching the replay. Not bad. Not great but not bad.

Again, it comes down to the selection of who's going to be roasted. David Hasselhoff? I could see having him be one of the roasters, and as such get joked on himself, but an entire hour of Hoff jokes? Meh.

Loved Lampanelli, as usual, and thought Cummings was surprisingly good (She got better towards the end of her set). Godfried is funny in bits and pieces but I've seen him do a better job and I couldn't stop wanting to throw up long enough to hear if Ross was any good (Really, Jeff, a speedo?)

Overall, not a bad show and definitely some amazing one-liners (The above-quoted Magic Johnson dig at Pam Anderson slayed me) but nothing special.

I miss Norm.

 

"David Hasselhoff walks into a bar. First thing in the morning. And stays until it closes."

"When alcohol fills out its tax return, it lists Hasselhoff as a dependent."

"...Lisa said she had knots in all four of her stomachs."

"Oh, wait, when they roasted me, I was still relevant." <-Pam Anderson.

 

I thought the exact same thing. I have no clue who she is but, damn, she's good.

 

Gilbert:

"Lisa Lampanelli has an important role in African American history. The last black man to pick cotton was pulling out her tampon."

 

"I ordered your CD on Amazon and it said people who bought this album also bought a shotgun."

 

"Your liver is so shriveled, black and dead if you put your ear to your side you can hear it going: 'What you talkin' about Willis?"

 

"Your liver is so black and bloated it could have starred in Precious."

 

Other than standing up on the podium and skewering Hasselhoff, Pam Anderson looked like she'd rather be anywhere else. And she still didn't look as uncomfortable as Hulk Hogan who, between the cracks about his wife, his sexuality and his daughter, did not have a good night.

 

I haven't seen someone own Hogan like that since Earthquake.