Hang with the hacks: Alabama shilling "press box experiences"

I happened upon this ...

http://rolltide.cstvauctions.com/auctiondisplay.cfm?auctionnbr=92807

Oooh, you mean I get to sit in the presence of Eli Gold as he stuffs chili dogs down his yap at halftime? And I get running stats per quarter? But I can't yell "Roll Tide!" any louder than the local hacks ...

Discuss.

rb

 

I remember several years back Auburn was playing the team I was covering at the time and about three rows behind me in the press box there was an older writer from a Alabama paper I'd never heard of, watching Alabama on one of the TVs.

"THIS TEAM CHEATS! WHEN ARE PEOPLE GOING TO REALIZE THAT THIS TEAM CHEATS!!!" He was SCREAMING at the TV.

Add in the accent and that was why several of us were laughing so hard we couldn't even stand up.

For a couple years afterwards whenever there was a silence in the press box, one of the beat writers would yell... "THIS TEAM CHEATS!!!"

 

And all the Dr Pepper you can drink and be sure to enjoy the Golden Flake chips with Pistol Pete Hot sauce before going to the Regions ATM for cash.

Will they also have trouble connecting to the Press Box wifi? That's the complete press box experience.

 

I wonder which four seats will be taken away for such an "experience"?

rb

 

Inasmuch as the opponent is Western Carolina, there should be room where the visiting media normally sits.

 

Do they get to ask Nick Saban a stupid question and then get yelled at?
Preferably one about the battle for third string left guard, because everyone knows the entire season hinges on it and "the media" is just too afraid to ask the tough questions. And because every damn yokel in SEC country has an opinion on their team's offensive line depth chart like they're a fucking expert.

 

"Winning bidder must be an Alabama Crimson Tide fan. "

 

So, if it's the SportsJournalists.com standards...flip-flops, 'Bama hat (backwards), torn cargo shorts and a mustard-stained T-shirt.

 

Do you get laid off at halftime?

 

They prefer the term, "Re-apply for their job."

 

Along with the Alabama class ring.
Dealing with these jamokes in what's supposed to be a working environment is another one of the reasons minor league football sucks.

 

So, it's a Martin Fennelly lookalike contest? (minus the Bama hat)