Half as many St. Patrick's Day parades in Chicago next year

http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2009/03/south-side-st-patricks-parade.html

The South Side Irish parade in Chicago will not come back next year "in its present form."

"Its present form" meaning an epidemic of drunkenness that in past years has included drunken-driving deaths, numerous pissings on neighborhood houses and lawns, multiple arrests and, a new one this year, a fake report of rape because a girl didn't want to cop to her folks she had been drunk and screaming at conductors and passengers on a commuter train.

My house is near one of the main routes back to the 'burbs from the parade, and people were stupid enough year after year to get caught in the roadblock set up there annually post-parade. I made a point not to drive that day.

 

You have to be criminally stupid to be busted for DWI at a sobriety checkpoint.

 

What do you expect? They're mostly Sox fans.

 

So not only are they drunk but they're probably violating the terms of their parole too.

 

Only 84 arrests in two years? Man, Chicago cops are getting lazyier

 

The neighborhood where the parade takes place is thick with cops, firefighters and city workers, so the cops don't want to arrest anybody lest they arrest some kid whose parent has a lot of clout in City Hall. Plus, half the cops themselves are shit-faced that day. Double plus, if you arrested everyone who committed a crime at the parade -- and keep in mind in Chicago it's illegal to walk in the street with an open container of alcohol -- you'd have to set up a special booking station and jail at McCormick Place to handle the crowd.

Basically, an arrest happens when someone is so out of control you're kinda forced to do something about it. Word is at least 11 cops were assaulted at the parade this year, one of the many reasons it's not happening anymore.