Growing up too fast...

This might not be the thread you expected, but here it goes.

I'm 24, single and in a "party" city. There are numerous bars and clubs and generally a tons of places to just party.
And I could care less if I go to one again.

Maybe it's just maturation, but I feel no desire to go out and party anymore. Granted, I'm not with my friends, but I just generally don't feel like I need it at all. After having a relatively long-term girlfriend and missing the party scene, then breaking up with her, I again want the simplicity of a "boring night." Maybe just dinner and a movie, or board games with good or something of the like.

Is this just a matter of wanting what I don't have, and when I get a GF/Wife, I'll go back to wanting to get crazy?
Or has anyone else felt this way at my age?

 

Pretty much everybody gets there at some point, though not usually that early. Maybe you'll have your midlife crisis early too -- you'll be 30 and wondering where your youth went and why you never do anything anymore.

 

I just moved out of a big party city, away from all of my friends. I did my own fair share of going to the bars on Fridays/Saturdays/Mondays/Tuesdays/whenever the occasion called for it in the last year, but since I moved (and especially since the bars here close at 1 a.m. and I'm rarely off work by then anyway), I'd just rather go to work, come home, watch a movie and hang out here.

I like being boring for now. College wore me out.

 

I was never much of a party animal, but any desire I had to get sauced went out the window when I met my future wife at 21. (not my future wife 21. that would get Boom kicking my ass) I pretty much drank to be social and to see if it led to anything with a similiarly sauced gal. Once my future wife and I fell madly in love, there was no need to drink or, obviously, troll for babes. Outside of my bachelor party, I haven't been drunk since the fall of 1994. And even at my bachelor party, I was only buzzed and goofy.

When my wife and I moved in together, we were 23 and 22, respectively, and we've been perfectly content since then to hang out at friends' houses and watch a movie or two or play cards or play board games. Once in a while, I'd wonder if it'd be cool to go bar crawling again...but then I'd hit a bar for something (a concert or maybe a Happy Hour with an old college friend) and I'd remember why I wanted nothing to do with it. The whole everyone-has-their-game-face-on...ugh. I never had much of a game face (shocking, I know) and I'm just so glad I don't have to do it anymore. I had a great time during my bar-crawling days, but it's not something I have any interest in, ever again.

 

So you don't enjoy a glass of wine with dinner? Drink beers with your friends at the poker game or the ballpark?

 

No...I didn't drink at all til I went away to college. Always feared I'd get my ass tanned if I came home drunk. Then I embraced the freedom of college for a while but it ran its course.

I've never liked the taste of wine. My wife does and will occassionally have some if we have a nice dinner at home or at a restaurant. As for beer...once in a great while I'll want a Killian's Red. Loved that stuff in college and I still like it. But I'll never pay for a beer at a ballpark, and none of my friends drink much at all. It's soda (or, now, in my case, water) and coffee at the poker table.

An exciting bunch, we are.

 

Never was much into the party scene, even when I was single. And I've been lucky enough that my serious relationships, since my first one began at 16, have all lasted pretty long -- "shortest" one was 2.5 years -- so I haven't had much need to do the bar-trolling thing, either.

I could always hold my own, though, (with alcohol and otherwise) so when it comes time for an outing/gathering like Vegas or Seattle the last two years, I like to get pretty sloshed like old times. Difference is, I only like to party with people I'd already be hanging out with anyway -- like most of those SJ crews. A bunch of people at a bar or a club? Fuck 'em. Too much drama, and as a rule, I don't like drama. I'm boring, and I like it that way.

GBNF, it all depends on if you're really content with that so-called "bored" life. I'm happy as a clam just having drinks with my girlfriend, or hanging out with a group of friends. Live the life that makes you happy -- and don't have any regrets.

 

Really? no fuckin shit.

Girl: "So what are you doing during the summer?"
Bucky: "I'm going to visit the gravesite of every player from the 1885 St. Louis Browns. And when I'm done with that I'm going to write a book about all the no-hitters broken up with two outs in the seventh inning from 1901 through 1930."
Girl: "I have to go stand over here now."

 

Fixed, fucker.

 

Hey, I never denied you hit the lottery!

 

Aside from this little threadjack about wonderful women and the men they put up with, I think the answer to the question is that the desire to be social and "go out" comes and goes.

I was pretty wild in high school, actually settled down the first three years of college, then partied from ages 21-23. By 24 I was in a relationship, by 27 I was practically a hermit. Now I'm more social and really, really enjoy the few opportunities I get to hang out with good friends. But these days a good bloody mary brunch works as well as a crazy bar for that kind of stuff.

 

You damn right.