Gripe session: Bad PA guys

Many moons ago when I covered American Legion baseball, the state tournament was held at a park in our area one year. There were enough reporters covering that the two PA guys sat outside. They kept talking and talking and talking and talking. Two very nice guys, but very damn annoying ... finally a couple of us started a little game. Those two guys would talk, then we would turn down the volume a notch since the PA controls were right beside us. Then another notch, then another notch ... then the tournament director would come into the press box and try to figure out what happened. He would turn the volume up ... and we would start over again.

We've got a guy in football who is still describing the last play when the offense has broken the huddle for the next play and has lined up for the next play.

 

Reminds me the one time I had to fill in as the PA announcer during my college years. I was doing what I thought was an admirable job, but then there was a foul right in front of me. I went ahead and announced a foul on the defensive player BEFORE the official gave the signals to the scoring table. After he does that he looks right at me and chimes in, "and YOU, wait until I make the call, would you?"

 

Change "no room in the press box" to "there is no press box" and you have me the two times I covered prep football.

Back to the original topic, those guys get on my last nerve.

 

Uh...how did his paper allow that?

 

I did that once. I have some friends in the JUCO/HS basketball coaching ranks who needed a PA guy (and a shot clock operator) a few times. Only once did I announce who the foul was on before the ref actually called it. Never again.

Did try to have a little bit of fun when I did their HS season. Before announcing the refs I would always make up a combined number of years' experience for the guys. A couple times I caught them asking each other how long they'd been reffing cuz they thought I was telling the truth. Besides that, just give a little extra emphasis to the home players' names and succintly announce the visitors when they did something.

 

Put me in the categories of not really minding the PA guys having fun or being huge homers. It is slightly annoying, at worst, and at best, good for some pretty big f-ing laughs.
No, my problem is when they screw up the yard markers. I've had people call me on more than one occasion because the PA announcer called a long run by the wrong yardage, etc.

 

That's why you don't listen to them. Keep yardage yourself. It's usually easy enough unless the play goes for 57 yards, then it becomes challenging.

I have no problem with the PA guys that are homers. That's just part of the gym's atmosphere. I hate the guys who yell and scream like their on amatuer radio.

Thanks, pal, we can see that. I saw that he broke four tackles. I know that was a nifty move in the paint. Geez.

 

If that's the worst of the PA group you've encountered, consider yourself lucky. Try sitting through back-to-back games with the PA man next to you trying to be the second coming of Stu Scott.

FT call: "Swoosh. There it is." That should give you a hint of what some of the rest of us deal with. And to answer your ensuing question, I don't know if he's trying to promote Nike with the "swoosh" call or not. I think it's an accident.

 

"And it's another ... Coooooogar first down!"

"Cooooooooooogar D!"

Thank you, Glenn Johnson, the mayor of Pullman and one of the worst homer PA announcers I've ever heard.

 

I once got the UCLA basketball PA guy to step down from that job after I wrote notes on a few occasions criticizing him for mispronouncing names of the opponents. I wrote that it was inexcusable for a program the stature of UCLA to have that happen. It was disrespecting the opponent.
The AD actually agreed with me.
I get a laugh out of this one. The local high school football PA guy, whenever a player helps another player up. He always says: "A very sportsmanlike action by Johnny Jones. That shows good coaching and good parenting." About the fifth time he says that each game, it starts to drive me crazy. I want to tell the guy: You know, his dad is in prison, his mom is a crack whore and he lives in a halfway house. So much for good parenting.

 

That's what I was saying. Mine would be accurate, but little Johnny's parents heard a different distance and that stuck in their head.