Great ... another celebrity couple nickname

Tonica!

http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news?sl...n&type=lgns


The week that will be: 'Boys being boys
By Steve Greenberg - SportingNews

Steve Greenberg
SportingNews.com

By their fruits -- or at least their cahoots -- ye shall know them as Tonica.

Tonica, as in Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson. As in a way more scrutinized, if slightly less beautiful, couple than Tom Brady and Gisele What's-her-face. Sportslywood's "it" couple, matter of fact.

As in the single organism that threatens to devour the Super Bowl dreams of the Dallas Cowboys. Perhaps you've heard that Romo and Simpson -- with others, including Cowboys tight end Jason Witten -- were in Mexico over the weekend devouring flautas and taquitos, if not Giants game tape.

If you're a Cowboys fan, that means you'll be subjected all week to deathly serious speculation that Tonica's powers of distraction are too potent for the quarterback to keep a grip on the task at hand. Which happens to be beating the chorizo out of said Giants, who head to Big D sporting a natty 8-1 road record.

That one loss came in Dallas in the season opener, before Romo had been linked to the desirous divorcee. Since then, gossip-mongering yentas, some of them in cowboy hats, have hit the airwaves and the blogosphere to forge a link between Tonica and any imperfection on the part of the 13-3 Cowboys.

The strains of angst rose up at Thanksgiving, New Year's Eve and now this week -- not to mention after every errant Romo throw -- and resuscitated talk that Romo fumbled away last year's playoff game in Seattle because then-girlfriend Carrie Underwood was in the house.

Even teammate Terrell Owens got in on the act after the Cowboys' loss to the Eagles last month -- a game attended by Simpson that was, incidentally, the worst statistical game of Romo's career. "Right now, Jessica Simpson is not a fan favorite in this locker room," Owens joked with reporters. "I think a lot of people feel like she's probably taking his focus away."

All of which crosses the border into the realm of loco. Simpson is a babe, but an arm-weakening huddle-wrecker? I really doubt it. Maybe Troy Aikman or Roger Staubach wouldn't have mellowed in Margaritaville at playoff time, but Romo isn't Aikman or Staubach. He's more the fun-loving type, and he plays best when he's feeling loose and, uh, frisky.

No matter: Tonica is a pseudo-scandal with legs that just won't quit. Que sera, sera.

 

I feel like smoking my marijuanica.

 

SimpMo would have been much better.

 

Boom 91?

 

I always wondered if Jessica pre-screened her boyfriends with the phrase, "If it doesn't fit, we must quit."

 

Heijira Incognito?

 

Jetony?

 

Yawndo?

TwoTony?

HeyPoin?

 

If what doesn't fit?

 

Wow....

Ok...

Uhm...

His helmet?

 

Good point. Safety first.

 

Is it TAHN-ica or TONE-ica?