Going for a job interview this week...

Why tell you, when I can SHOW you?

*awkward silence*

 

Don't forget dating history, with a written statement from each ex as to why the relationship ended.

 

How do you take your pants off without removing your cowboy boots?

I'll hang up and listen.

 

I'm guessing -- and this is just a guess -- that he never put them on.

Actually, it's not a guess. I took the job, and he made a point of wearing pants as infrequently as possible. He was a northerner unaccustomed to hot temperatures.

 

A Northerner whose response to hot temperatures was to take off his pants. But he still wears cowboy boots and a sport coat?

 

Damn Yankees.

 

Don't accuse your interviewer of being a rapist.

 

I guess birth certificates are only necessary if you want the job as president of the United States.

 

At a job interview, do not tell implausible stories.

Wear a tie.

 

Make sure your fly is zipped.

 

Frank forgot to mention your shoes. Always wear your best, assuming that your best are already broken in properly.

DO NOT buy new shoes for a job interview.

 

well duh, he was still on the clock