Go F**K yourself, 2008

So sorry, BYH. That is so, so rough.

My dad died this year, after being sick for many months. I'm counting the deaths of friend's family members on 4 hands now. My best friend had a miscarriage. Another close friend's husband lost his job just as they were getting back on their feet after his previous job loss...I could go on but I'm already bummed out.

2008 can't end soon enough, but I'm afraid the badness is going to seep into 2009 and beyond.

Losing my dad was the thing I feared most in life. Now I fear that I will never get over or get used to him being gone.

Go fuck yourself, 2008 indeed.

 

By the way. As far as your Mom goes, I'm not overtly religious, but I do honestly believe that a person who has lived their life like your mom has lived hers, she'll have plenty of happy times ahead of her, in the next world if not this one.

 

So sorry, BYH.

Monday we went to the funeral for my wife's cousin's wife. She was 42 and left a 2-year-old and a husband she had married only three years ago. I met her only twice and she seemed nice -- anyway, the church was packed, so a lot of people liked her. She did lots of volunteer stuff, etc.

As you're trying to do now, the priest tried to make some sense of it for people. I remember that I thought it was pretty weak, and I have nothing against priests as I am not Catholic and they hold no power over me. And two days later, I can't remember a word of it. That's how good the explanation was.

But I have a feeling that even if I understood the real reason why this stuff happens, I wouldn't agree with it. Probably most of us who believe in God feel uncomfortable being in disagreement with him, but I think your feelings are probably normal considering the circumstances. I've been known to take a couple weeks off from prayer when I know I'm not in a suitable mood to be communicating with the almighty. But I always come back.

 

There is never any justice when bad things happen to good people. You're one of the best, Beej, and my best wishes to you and your family. Keep your mom happy and cherish every moment you have with her. I hope, for your sake and hers, that 2009 sees better days.

 

All I can add is a ditto and a reinforcement that you have many friends here, BYH. Call if you need.

 

beej - you might tell me to go fuck myself for writing this, but i will any way:

your situation, while it sucks, is what you make of it for both you and your mother. i watched my older brother suddenly die when i was quite young. i never had the chance to tell him how much i loved him and how much i'd miss him or even say good bye. he was just gone.

tell your mother that you love her, and be her rock while she battles this. she can end up winning. also, walk away from this having learned something.

please don't let this turn you bitter because it will take years to recover.

we can't manipulate all the cards life deals us, but we can control how we play them.

 

byh, damn. damn. damn. damn.

life does indeed suck. it's totally random. damn.

you've got many friends here eager to lend whatever support we can.

it's all we can do.

damn.

damn.

damn.

this i the best i've got.

damn.

my dad, the best man i've ever known, is 79. my mom, the best woman i've ever known, is 76 on jan. 18. i can't bear to think of life without them.

damn.

 

I just want to echo what others have said.....BYH, we're here for you, and we're thinking of you. Take care, and I wish you and your family the best of everything for 2009 and beyond.

 

Likewise, shockey. Likewise.

Beej, we've never met (that I know of), but you've still got a hug and a prayer coming from this neck of the woods. Stay strong.

 

Damn, BYH. Hopefully 2009 is better for you and all of us. I also have similar feelings toward 08.