George Lucas really is determined to CGI over his own accidental brilliance

A part of me was a little happy that IJ4 failed in comparison to the original trilogy. It should make studios and directors realize that more is not always better. I'm glad there is no Back to the Future 4, and I'm sure critics will destroy Men in Black 3. Leave the movies alone and stop ruining them, or else they turn into the Saw series.

 

Yup. But just try telling that to the "artist" who can't leave well enough alone.

 

First of all, "Saw" was god-awful from movie No. 1.

Second, I am praying with every fiber of my being that there is not a "Toy Story 4," for some of the reasons talked about regarding other franchises. "Toy Story" could not have ended more perfectly, from an artistic standpoint. Just hit every note on growing up from the first movie through that final wrenching scene of the third installment. Those movies, at times, have made it emotionally draining to be a father because every plaything is now an enormously weighty metaphor to me.

Please, Pixar, do not fuck with them.

 

Part of the issue is that, to me, the protagonist is Anakin.

But as we know, he eventually turns into the antagonist. And it's hard to root for him when you know how he's going to eventually turn out.

 

I really hope the 3D versions of the prequels tank at the box office.

 

Further complicating things:

1. Anakin doesn't even show up until halfway through the first film.

2. Lucas writes this completely convoluted "pod race" wager so Quigon Gin can "win" Anakin his freedom from slavery.

 

Lucas wrote the pod race scene because he knew it would translate well to video games and net him some more cash.

 

No chance.

 

George Lucas is one of the only people I've come across who refuses to meet kids from Make-A-Wish whose wish is to meet him.

I realize he has a ginormous ego, but really.

 

Is it possible that it would be too emotionally difficult for him?

Just spitballing ...

 

Episode I and Episode II could have been edited together into one decent, but short, movie.

Get rid of Jar Jar completely. Deep-six the whole Gungan subplot while you're at it.

Limit the appearance of Kiddie Anakin to about 10 minutes in a flashback sequence. Show the scene of him saying goodbye to mommy.

Concentrate on the battle between Darth Maul and Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan.

Jump directly to Anakin at 17.

Show Shmi getting killed, resulting in the first appearance of Darth Vader.

Dump most of the sloggy romance stuff, get right to the battle in the coliseum.

Total running time, maybe 90 minutes.

Then you can jump straight to Episode III, which actually stands up with the original series (for the most part except for the emo-Padme stuff).

 

This not a new development. The Greedo shot was inserted into the Special Edition in 1997. I understand Lucas not wanting Solo to come across as a cold-blooded killer, but he did have a gun trained on him as the guy is telling him he's a dead man. So Lucas actually screwed it up worse, turning Solo into some lucky fellow as opposed to the badass he came across as in the original.

Like Mizzou, I have never been more disappointed in a movie than I was in Ep. I. I actually got goosebumps and maybe a bit choked up when I heard that intro music again. I grew up on Star Wars and was obsessed with it until I was a teenager, so I had not anticipated a movie like that ever before. I tried to pretend I liked it afterward. But it was awful.