Funniest damn thing I've seen in some time

As a veteran of a few garage sales, I can say, Scribe, you're UNDERSTATING it. Any one I've had (usually at my mother-in-law's or a neighbor's), I've had to ask people to leave because, you know, it's 7 a.m. and we're not set up yet. One time at my mother-in-law's, I opened the garage door to start moving out tables, and was startled by the site of a lady going through stuff in the garage. (She got in through the unlocked side door.) I'm located not far from the famous Swap-O-Rama (alongside I-294 in Alsip, Ill.), so there are people combing through stuff they think they can sell for double on Saturday there.

Also, JR, I don't know how Canadians tend to do their garage/yard/rummage saling, but here in the good ol' USA, or at least my part of it, the busiest sale time is from opening (or before) til 10:30 a.m. on Friday, with a hiccup from noon-1. Saturdays are pretty slow, with maybe some people who there the day before bringing back people they think might want something, or seeing if they can find what they liked yesterday for half price.

My favorite was the guy who argued with me over some wallet or something, insisting he would pay no more than 50 cents. After I relented -- hey, he knew my goal was to make sure this shit didn't stay here -- he asked if had change for $100. I felt the rage of Jim Brown and Isaac Hayes toward Chris Rock in "I'm Gonna Git Ya Sucka."

 

you are confirming penetration?

 

Me: Yes, but only a $20. So if you really want that wallet for $0.50, you'd better go find another $79.50 worth of junk you want to buy.

I'd rather piss him off and throw out the wallet than give the asshole the satisfaction.

Yikes...I get effing cranky when I'm sleepy. ... I do like the ad for "The Dog Daily"/IAMS at the bottom of the page, though. Cute puppy...

 

Absolutely. That's way more than 50 cents' worth of satisfaction on your part.