Forty-One-Year-Old Man Finds Out His Father Is...

That lede made me laugh.

 

I was thinking it would be really ironic if the father was Maury Povich.

 

I think IJAG would approve of that being called ironic.

 

And on Maury's show, Charlie starts taunting the kid and the mom when the test shows he's not the father, while the crowd boos lustily.

 

Charles Manson: Cry little piggy! Cry! <singing> Oh garbage dump, oh garbage dump...Maury's son was born in a garbage dump.</singing>

 

Maury: Charlie, you said that you never killed anyone. The lie detector says ... that's a lie.

Manson: "What?"

Maury: "Charlie, you said that you never was a member of a cult. The lie detector says ... that's a lie."

Manson: "No way. It's a conspiracy!"

Maury: "One more, real quick. When it comes to 41-year-old Matthew Roberts, Charlie ... You are the father!"

Manson: "I'll kill you, Povich!"

 

That unpaid child support is gonna kill him at his next parole hearing.

 

Awesome.