Finding Amelia

It's a Stuckey's outside of Peoria, and he's working with Jim Morrison.

 

Aren't most Stuckey's porn stores now?

 

I wouldn't know. No, really, I wouldn't.

 

Then again, if this story is too different from whatever wildly speculative ending the film has (if it has one), that could undermine the film's success.

 

Hey, that's not a pecan log!

 

It is at least plausible that this island is her final resting place based on the information that's out there.

And if it's not, it'd be nice to know who they did find all those years ago. Somebody died there around that time.

Starving to death on a desert island with no drinkable water would be a horrible way to go.

 

The only reason I know is because the one literally in my backyard (no, literally, I could see it from my garage) on I-70 got turned into a porn store when I was 17. And then a local church made a big deal about it and protested it. Every day.

 

Rechristened "Sticky's."

 

If I had my choice in the matter, I'd rather just go down in the ocean.