Father's Day Rant

I've said for a couple years, there are a lot of things my dad taught me about being a good person. But the most important things he's taught me about being a father -- if the day does come -- are probably going to be those things he didn't do. I'm so far from being experienced enough to know or even assume I've got a clue, but I think if I can be a little better than him, it's a success, and that's what he wants -- for me to be a little better than him.

 

Sometimes being called a 'great dad' can mean the world.

When my Oldest Scicluna was a baby (2-3 months old), I had to take him with me to the laundromat. I was physically and mentally exhausted, juggling a late-night career with being Mr. Mom while Mrs. Scicluna worked during the daytime. All this on 3-4 hours sleep a night (baby was a poor sleeper).

So the baby is sleeping as I bring him, and my laundry in, and I'm figuring as my clothes wash and dry, that I would have a minibreak. Soon as everything's settled, baby wakes up. I talk to him a bit, he needed a diaper change as well.

An elderly man comes over to me, and tells me, "You're a great father. I can see, just by the way he's looking at you, that he knows you're his father. And he's very lucky. There aren't too many great fathers out there."

Two elderly women (his friends, wife, who knows?), see him talking to me, and ask him what he's saying. He repeats his compliment to me, and the women agree, and tell me to keep up the good work.

When my wash ends, the three of them tell me to sit, while they tossed the loads into the dryers. After the clothes were dried, the three of them helped me put them in the baskets, and helped me carry them out to my car.

It's been years, but I still think of those three elderly people, and the compliment that they gave me. In times when I know I am having a bad day as a dad, and even the most perfect dads have them, I think of those kind words.

And on a nutty note, I sometimes wonder if they were like angels like on "Highway to Heaven", where their assignment was to just go to a laundromat and encourage a new father.

 

im not sure how many on here know the story of how i found my dad and then 14-year-old sister after not seeing them for 12 years or so. maybe i'll share that when i am actually at a computer later.

 

I'm in the middle. My dad is an OK guy. We get along fine. But he just wasn't interesting in what I was doing while growing up or now. He wasn't a workaholic or an alcoholic or mean or anything bad. Just really apathetic to stuff going on.

 

I've enjoyed reading the responses and appreciate the sharing. My point was merely someone judging a dad from what they see from the outside. I remember when everyone thought Bing Crosby was a "great dad" and then one of his kids wrote a book.
I'm blessed to have a great relationship with my dad, we spent a week in Chicago together in 2001, watching the Cubs, the White Sox, hitting a couple of bars and museums, pretty much Ferris Bueller's Day Off with beer, (Bucket List type stuff), my point was just that I know of a lot of people who were perceived as "great dads" by those on the outside who later realized they were quite wrong.

 

I've got no problem with people referring to dad as a "great guy". As someone mentioned earlier, there are much more critical things to have get under your skin. That being said, anyone making a big about a win on Father's Day (i.e., Dale Jr. : ), yes, that's worth being annoyed by.

 

AA, I agree with you in general. But when a driver whose father died on the track races for an owner whose only son died on the way to the track, I say let them work it out their own way.

 

Tart, that's a great sig line.

My dad sucked, but in resenting him sucking, I only hurt myself. Best not to resent the suck. Easier said, of course.

 

I have no problem with Dale Jr. latching onto that sentiment. But I do have a problem with the networks playing it up that way. You could make the argument that every winning pitcher on Sunday won one for their kid.

 

Here's my Fathers Day rant -- it's not Father's Day, is it?

/mildly confused and picking nits since I don't have my AP stylebook handy

 

It would be a great sporting event moment if two guys were competing for a win and the announcer said, "this would be a great Father's Day present for Joe Blow's dad, as for John Doe, well he's an orphan so I'm sure he doesn't care as much.

 

Day for Father. Ergo Fathers Day.

Fathers try. Some better than others. Sperm donors don't and shouldn't.