Farmington sports writer job - longest ad ever on SJ board?

From JJobs.com.
Has to push the record for longest Journalism Job Ad ever. Possibly funniest and/or lamest wording ever as well. Just IMO. They should pay $25K to anyone who reads the entire thing.

Grab a cup of coffee and try not to laugh too hard at times.

Company: The Daily Times
Position: Sportswriter/designer
Location: Farmington, New Mexico
Job Status: Not Specified
Salary: $25,000 to $30,000
Ad Expires: May 23, 2012
Job ID: 1311972
Website: http://www.daily-times.com


Description:


Grow West!

The Daily Times, the largest media entity in the Four Corners region serving readers in New Mexico, Colorado, Utah, Arizona and the Navajo Nation, has an opening for a sports writer/designer after in-house promotions. Our sports staff has an excellent track record for advancement, both to other newspapers as well as to news-side management.

Duties and needs include excellent sports writing ability, page design, meeting deadlines, nightly online responsibilities in coordination with our online editor, pagination on QuarkExpress, good copy editing skills and excellent news judgment. Everyone is growing a digital strategy, so obviously you must fit into that here as well and be able to have fun with it.

The hire will be someone with a focus on ambitious goals grounded in both, excellent journalism and multimedia platforms for delivery of it.

We have a lot of great talent here, and we're looking to add to the team. Don't apply unless you have a passion for this kind of work, an understanding of the great Southwest and an excellent work ethic. If you like good journalism, the Southwest climate, diverse culture and the outdoors, you'll love this place. If you're looking for the nearest Macy's, keep looking.Now for our standing ad:

We seek solid candidates looking to experience lively action at a daily/digital newsroom that is the largest media entity in the Four Corners region, serving readers in New Mexico, Colorado, Utah, Arizona and the Navajo Nation.

We seek journalists hungry to go beyond the norm, someone who wants to dig to find out why domestic violence rates are higher on an American Indian reservation, or why there are those who are biased in an American Indian border town, or why folks in Aztec believe in UFOs, or why people desperate for help can't get it to their remote ranch with 911. Good photography opportunities also exist with all of these fascinating stories.

We deal with the FBI, a progressive local police unit fighting gangs, and we deal with the local sheriff in a land where outlaws still try to hide and cowboys still ride horses to work. The journalism potential is unlimited for those who have a solid work ethic and a drive to do stories far beyond the norm.

A documentary film team was here in 2007 to interview us about our newspaper's powerful influence on local racial/cultural issues. Steven Spielberg was sitting on a movie-rights option with a story about Kit Carson and the massive Navajo Nation based in our back yard. Here, yesterday and today are a living link, and the outdoors adventure life is the world's greatest.

Throw in a passion for journalism, and this place rocks! (Pardon the outdoors pun.)

We've won several national awards and fellowships, including from Columbia University where we were asked to speak in New York in 2008 about our investigative and diversity coverage. Ditto in Chicago, Boston and in various other large forums. Our staff eagerly applies for and earns fellowships for advanced training. We also won an Inland Press national award in 2008 for a profile story of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, reported in Venezuela, after talking with him about connections between his oil fields and ours here in the Four Corners. Our editor won the 2009 Robert G. McGruder Award, the nation's highest newspaper honor for diversity leadership and combating racism. And, we won the 2010 Public Service Award ahead of all other dailies in New Mexico, our second such award in three years.


We just won another national honor after APME announced we've won the 2011 Internationational Perspective Award for local perspective of international interests. Our project, "Navajo Nation, Navajo World," focused on the promised advent of wireless telecom on the Navajo Nation and how it can connect the remote tribe to ports and countries around the world.

We've convinced a former CIA/FBI agent to work with us on special investigative pieces by teaming with our best reporters.

We're a small, cozy newsroom, that likes to think big.

No, we don't have a dime to spend. We're just creative in finding one. That's why we're patient in our hiring and hunt ambitious, talented and opportunity-seeking journalists.

Wimps need not apply. We go after racial bigots and closed-minded governments, and the battle often gets fierce. The rewards, however, are tremendous. Keep reading...

Imagine life right in the middle of a western novel: The magnificent Rocky Mountains within view and only an hour to the north. The colorful Navajo Nation only minutes to the west. High desert landscape with endless scenic views and spectacular sunsets right here in town. And, at an altitude higher than the mile-high city of Denver, the weather here is great, with sunshine year-round, cool summer breezes, dry temps and fairly mild winters.

Add to that: the annual Connie Mack World Series for baseball nuts wanting to see the nation's best pro and college prospects; the national high school rodeo championships; colorful American Indian festivals; hot air balloon festivals; some of the best fly fishing in the world; a ski resort an hour away; one of the most modern public libraries in the nation; an awesome indoor aquatic center that has hosted Olympic prelims; the recently ranked No. 1 public golf course in the U.S.; great whitewater rafting and...well...you get the picture.

Farmington, spurred by active oil-and-gas industry, is the commerce center for the Four Corners region, tucked in the northwest corner of New Mexico and only an hour south of the Colorado resorts in Durango. We also serve readers in Arizona and Utah, making us the chief media source for the entire Four Corners region. Furthermore, we know good journalism, we have exciting goals and we aim to become one of the best community newspapers in the nation. We preach local first, and we're darn serious about our goals for quality journalism across the board. That is one reason we will continue our search until we find the right candidates.

We work hard; we play hard. We have many expectations, and we are placing the bar high. Want to join us?

Please send asap a cover letter (specific about your desire to join our news team and live in the Four Corners), resume and samples to: Troy Turner, editor, The Daily Times, P.O. Box 450, Farmington, N.M. 87499; or to tturner@daily-times.com.




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The paper isn't not going to find anyone when one a willing job candidate calls out the SE on a public website.

 

Best part is how it goes four paragraphs and then it says "now for the ad." Wow, didn't know want ads needed a foreword.

This ad reminds me of the time Johnny Carson introduced Bill Clinton as a guest on his show a few days after the Arkansas governor gave that keynote speech at the Democratic convention.

 

This whole ad could be summed up in two sentences:

Super-long hours, little pay. And don't even think of asking for overtime.

 

And it doesn't sound like there's much more to do than commit journalism.

 

Didn't the paper hire a recent CU-Boulder grad for this position, or was that the SE?

 

The writer became the SE, as SEs don't stick around very long.

 

And if they found out the suit you're wearing is from Macy's...well, good luck, mister.

 

No Macy's? How about Bloomingdale's?

 

On which web site?

 

Woah. What did I miss?