Esquire's Why we cheat

Biologically, we're not programmed for monogamy.
Monogamy is a meme (not in the lame, Internet definition but the real definition) that might have outlived its utility.

 

There's a ton of biological urges we get. Doesn't mean it's a good idea to act on them.

 

I'm surprised married men find women to cheat with, honestly. Just seems like so many pieces have to fall into place for an affair to occur: (1) Willing man; (2) Has to figure out that a woman is interested. That was tough enough when we were all on the market. I couldn't even imagine it with the obstacle of having to explain away your status; (3) Both have to then get past their inhibitions and act on it, which would seem to be an enormous step to take for each person, since each knows it's wrong, even if they privately were excited by the idea.

Give me my "boring" life any day.

 

I'm not saying infidelity is a good or bad idea. I'm addressing the question: Why?

 

Copious amounts of booze help.

 

Such a cop-out.

 

I could easily accept this "running counter to natural instinct" argument, but there are many species of animals that engage in monogamous relationships, if that is the correct terminology. Not only that, but some people's brains are more predisposed to desiring multiple sexual partners at one time than others. Personally, I think people who cheat--especially on spouses or S.O.'s they've been with for many, many years--are weak-willed and untrustworthy, but that's just me.

 

How is that a cop-out?
I have a very specific, and weird, idea about monogamy. I don't preach it, but I live it.
Despite the fact that I am, serially, monogamous, I can understand that monogamy is a cultural, not biological, idea that might have limited use.

 

I bet some of the most reliable employees are cheaters. And I bet a lot of criminals are monogamous. Personality is so multifaceted; you just can't paint with a broad brush

 

Just the sales guys.

 

Monogamy was a huge idea. It helped turn baboons into people.
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I enjoyed reading that. I would like to hear that read out loud by Clive Owen.