ESPN employee Q&A memo that's making the rounds

I did some searches and couldn't find that this has been posted.
<a href="http://deadspin.com/sports/please-give-me-back-my-stapler/espns-secret-interoffice-complaint-memorandum-279257.php">
Deadspin obtained a copy of a LENGTHY ESPN memo on a wide variety of topics, some minor, that answers questions from employees.</a>

Here's the funniest:

 

Ahhhhh!!

 

"Recent deals, (NFL, NASCAR, NBA), have in fact included far less ancillary programming commitments compared to previous contracts."

Bullshit. Every scrap of NBA news is on SportsCenter, most often delaying in-season highlights, because the network is so far up the league's arse it ain't funny. The NFL is the same way (do we really need every scrap of news in May?).

Other than that, I loooooooooove this memo!

 

I'm curious to know how many of us have options on pet health insurance.

 

Stunningly, I don't.

I found myself thinking that ESPN's employees are a bunch of pains in the asses.

 

Agreed, especially when I read this one:

Question: Is there or could there be an option to receive a pay check once a week instead of every other Thursday? Many of us live pay check to pay check. Being able to be paid every week would help tremendously.

Answer: All ESPN employees are paid on a bi-weekly basis and have the same pay date. Payroll is a shared service provided by our parent company and ESPN cannot operate under a different system.

 

This is big:

For example, we have reached a long-term deal with the Elias Sports Bureau to become the provider of season and historical stats for the major pro sports on all our platforms. Elias is the official statistician for the NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL and Arena Football, and this will make ESPN the only company to have those leagues official stats on all its platforms. Look for Elias' stats to begin populating ESPN.com's pages with the NFL season this fall and rolling out sport-by-sport into 2008.