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Elopement

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by PeteyPirate, Jul 28, 2009.

  1. Magic In The Night

    Magic In The Night Active Member

    We've actually been discussing this idea as well although we're not engaged yet. I do think I would miss the no gifts. I'll be interested to see what you decide.
     
  2. PeteyPirate

    PeteyPirate Guest

    Would it be wrong to elope and ask for gifts retroactively?
     
  3. Magic In The Night

    Magic In The Night Active Member

    Well, theoretically, you could have a little "party" afterward and probably people would bring some gifts. But they might not bring really expensive ones!
     
  4. PeteyPirate

    PeteyPirate Guest

    Based on my research (Google), there are rules for elopement etiquette. Apparently, not having a wedding with guests precludes you from asking for gifts. However, many people still respond with gifts after receiving an elopement announcement.
     
  5. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Why not elope if you want, and spend the money on the trip/honeymoon then have a party for the relatives without all the cost and fuss of a wedding.
     
  6. txsportsscribe

    txsportsscribe Active Member

    i've never given a gift because of a wedding. have given many because of a marriage.
     
  7. HackyMcHack

    HackyMcHack Member

    Another option: Have a simple beach wedding. No real need to get dressed up, ma nature has taken care of the decorations, and everybody gets a vacation out of it.
     
  8. bydesign77

    bydesign77 Active Member

    You know, it might not hurt to ask the parents what they think about it. I suggested it to my dad and my father-in-law. They were going to pony up 10 grand if we would just go to Vegas and get married. Now, my wife nixed that idea, but if you're considering it anyway, might not hurt to put the feelers out, ya know?
     
  9. PeteyPirate

    PeteyPirate Guest

    The only problem is that putting the feelers out has the potential of eliminating the option altogether.
     
  10. zeke12

    zeke12 Guest

    One of my best friends from high school eloped this weekend, Pirates.

    He had talked about it before, but, to be honest, I thought it was just bar talk. They have two kids already, and there were some issues with family.

    They flew to Jamaica and got married on the beach with hotel staff as the witnesses.

    We (meaning his friends) all found out about it via Facebook and an email he sent all of us when they got back.

    I will say this; If you have a close group of friends, the general reaction is going to be kind of WTF at first. Talked with a lot of buddies the last couple days. We wanted to throw him a bachelor party. We wanted to be there and stand up with him. We wanted to buy him something.

    It's not like we didn't know he was going to get married (they'd been engaged for years) and I don't think anyone is angry or hurt, because they did exclude everyone, including their families.

    But it was weird, I'll say that.

    My advice for it you do it is to plan a reception for when you get home. People want to wish you well. Even the friends your age who completely understand the reasons why people elope. Just my two cents.
     
  11. spup1122

    spup1122 New Member

    Sometimes I wish we'd done the simple beach wedding. Our immediate family could have paid for their tickets to the location and we could have rented a big beach house. Probably would have been a lot cheaper than my parents having to take out a second mortgage for our wedding.

    We had about 150 people there. The wedding was probably somewhere around 15,000. My sister is now planning a wedding with about 400 people. I don't want to imagine the cost, but she is an accountant and her fiance is a physicist, so they're helping pay for the wedding a lot more than we could, being journalists and all.
     
  12. waterytart

    waterytart Active Member

    This may not resonate with you, FDP, but there is something profound about claiming each other publicly, about saying in front of your relatives, "From now on, this person is my family."
     
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