dumb reporter anecdotes

If they're in the Navy, I always go with Admiral Sissy-Mary.

But I watch WAY too much television...

 

Grrrr!

 

We're always glad to see you Navy boys. Whenever we have to fight somewhere, you all are kind enough to give us a ride.

 

Oh no you didn't! Man the 16-inch guns! Prepare for a broadside!

 

Boots would be a Rear Admiral.

ba-dum-dum

 

I'll prepare, Allen, but you have to ask me nicely.

That means I want you to sit there, in that faggoty white uniform, and with your Texas mouth extend me some fucking courtesy.

You have to ask me nicely.

Come to think of it, easy as this is, I think Senor Sorkin might have a thing against the Navy...

 

I believe he might, Zeke. I believe he might.

The long-standing feud between the Navy and Marines could easily put to shame the rivalries between UT and A&M or the Yankees and Red Sox.

It used to be joked that during wartime, the Navy and Marines fought together. During peacetime, they fought each other.

 

Editor is one the phone with someone and gets the person's voicemail.
"For a good time, call Dick at 757-5599."
I turn to him and say, "Sir, that's quite the message."
He laughs.
"I think I might have to use that..."
"Just don't use the same number."

 

Don't brag alleyallen, your cannon is no 16-incher.

 

Ew. This is terribly skeevy.

But hi, PapaAllen!

 

Oh, my.

 

I've been insulted. Maligned. Slandered. That's it. I'm suing.