Does this mean I'm old?

Take and post pictures. That's an order!!!

 

About 4-5 years ago, I went out to my mailbox and my issue of Rolling Stone had arrived. It had two very attractive women on the cover.

I don't claim to be anything resembling hip, but I do follow entertainment, I'm a movie buff, I watch a ton of TV, I read entertainment magazines...

I had no idea who either of the women were. It wasn't a case of not being familiar with their music/TV show/movie, I simply had no idea who they were. I'd never heard of them.

It was Blake Lively and Leighton Meester from Gossip Girl. Obviously, Lively has since been in movies I've seen, but that was one of those strange, "wow, this is what is supposed to be cool and it's not even remotely on my radar."

 

Yeah, as a parent there are some network shows that if they're on while my kids are still awake I feel the need to sprint to the TV to make sure they don't see any of it... That's mostly for shows like Two Broke Girls, Two and a Half Men, the evening news, any procedural that could show the body of a dead child before the opening credits roll...

 

Hearing Pearl Jam on the classic rock station.

 

I probably shouldn't do that, but my Facebook friends could probably find them.

 

This reminds me of some spots on the Military Channel I saw in the middle of the night recently.

 

Also, this does not mean you're old.

You're turkey neck means you're old.

This just means you're a prude.

 

You spelled "flabby, baggy and saggy" wrong.

I like nice bosoms as much as anybody.

Anna Kendrick gets two thumbs up (and more) from me. Scarlett Johannson is also very nicely equipped. (Both, incidentally, beat the flaming living hell out of Katy Perry's rapidly drooping fleshbags.)

However, neither of them, although they hardly hide their attributes from public view, constantly shove their honkers into the lens of every single camera within eyeshot.

What has always ticked me off about Katy Perry is that ever since the moment she boob-burst into public consciousness, her marketing attack has been completely based on one thing (well, two things): tits. All Tits, All The Time.

And, sad to say ..... they've Never. Really. Been. That. Good.

And they're getting worse.

It's not that I don't like tits -- I just like to maintain high standards.

 

If I am 75 and getting pussy, I am not going to complain too much about what her tits look like.

 

They're fatty soft tissue, Star Man.
They're supposed to subject themselves to Newton's Laws after 30 or 40 years on this planet.
Katy Perry and women like her realized that their orbs are fashion accessories, albeit finite, that go with anything.
And usually maximize earning potential.
(edit- fixed for subject-verb agreement

 

Thank you, Walt. I was just going to leave this alone, but I am glad you chimed in.

Heaven forbid we teach young people to have a moral compass. I'll be the first to go on record as saying oral sex is a good thing, but I don't feel we need to encourage youngsters to think it's OK to have a free for all at it. Society has been eroding, and the results are evident. I am afraid we have passed the point of no return.

 

1. If I were a single man, I'd work really hard to be Jake_Taylor's new friend.
2. I realized I wasn't a kid anymore -- not old, but not a kid -- when I realized the last two guys who played Superman are younger than me.